I have the exact same problem with my boyfriend and I have no idea what to do anymore. I'm 18 and he's 20, we've been together for almost 2 years. In the beginning, it was good. We tried a lot of different things in a lot of different places and it was fun. For about the past year, it's diminished. It turned from once a day, to once a week, to once a month, to even longer. We had sex 3 weeks ago and before that it was 5 months earlier. I think the only reason why we even had sex 3 weeks ago is because I found a bunch of porn on his phone that he was trying to hide from me, and he felt bad for me. I have to beg for him to even kiss me. A hundred percent of the time I either initiate sex or I begged him to have sex the day before and he pities me. When we do have sex, it's the same routine and it's a sad excuse for one. I have to have my back turned to him for him to start touching me. It's humiliating. All he does is touch me for a minute and then has me give him oral to make him hard enough to be able to have sex with me, and then I have to be on top. No other positions. I've told him I don't like being on top all the time and that I enjoy receiving oral too but it doesn't help. His excuse is that he doesn't think I'd like it because I don't moan enough, or whatever. His excuse doesn't even make sense. I've tried to have him do other things to make him feel more in control of the sex, like pulling my hair or "choking" me, but he says he doesn't like it because he thinks he's hurting me. When I bring all this up to him he either says we'll have sex the next day (never happens) or he calls me shallow. That sex isn't everything. This has taken such a toll on me that I can't even look at myself in the mirror anymore. I have no self esteem. I use to like doing my makeup, but I can't even do that now because I'd have to see myself. I avoid having pictures taken of me. I feel hideous. Every other aspect of our relationship is amazing. He's my best friend. I don't want to lose him, but sometimes it feels like I lost him months ago. I'm too young to be in a sexless relationship.
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I have the exact same problem with my boyfriend and I have no idea what to do anymore. I'm 18 and he's 20, we've been together for almost 2 years. In the beginning, it was good. We tried a lot of different things in a lot of different places and it was fun. For about the past year, it's diminished. It turned from once a day, to once a week, to once a month, to even longer. We had sex 3 weeks ago and before that it was 5 months earlier. I think the only reason why we even had sex 3 weeks ago is because I found a bunch of porn on his phone that he was trying to hide from me, and he felt bad for me. I have to beg for him to even kiss me. A hundred percent of the time I either initiate sex or I begged him to have sex the day before and he pities me. When we do have sex, it's the same routine and it's a sad excuse for one. I have to have my back turned to him for him to start touching me. It's humiliating. All he does is touch me for a minute and then has me give him oral to make him hard enough to be able to have sex with me, and then I have to be on top. No other positions. I've told him I don't like being on top all the time and that I enjoy receiving oral too but it doesn't help. His excuse is that he doesn't think I'd like it because I don't moan enough, or whatever. His excuse doesn't even make sense. I've tried to have him do other things to make him feel more in control of the sex, like pulling my hair or "choking" me, but he says he doesn't like it because he thinks he's hurting me. When I bring all this up to him he either says we'll have sex the next day (never happens) or he calls me shallow. That sex isn't everything. This has taken such a toll on me that I can't even look at myself in the mirror anymore. I have no self esteem. I use to like doing my makeup, but I can't even do that now because I'd have to see myself. I avoid having pictures taken of me. I feel hideous. Every other aspect of our relationship is amazing. He's my best friend. I don't want to lose him, but sometimes it feels like I lost him months ago. I'm too young to be in a sexless relationship.
August 9, 2017 - 4:06amThis Comment
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