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women who have had cervical cancer

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Has Cervical Cancer Affected Your Life?

By Susan Cody HERWriter Guide April 12, 2011 - 8:16am

Thanks to trace5 for starting this Group!

If cervical cancer has had an impact on your or a loved one, please share your story! If we can help or support someone going through this kind of cancer, let us know - we're here to help!

~Susan

By Susan Cody HERWriter Guide February 19, 2012 - 5:16pm

Hi caligirl321

Thanks for your post and I'm very sorry to read about your diagnosis. Hopefully your cancer has been caught early but I really understand your fears.

To prepare, make a list of your questions and bring a note pad for the answers. You may think you will remember everything but you'll be nervous and may not. Writing down all the answers will help.

Your doctor will talk to you about your options. To learn more, read here: http://www.empowher.com/cervical-cancer/content/cervical-cancer-treatmen...

Please let me know if this helps and please stay with us for support along this journey,

~Susan

February 19, 2012 - 5:16pm
By caligal321 February 17, 2012 - 7:54pm

Hello all,
I was just diagnosed with cervical cancer on Monday and had an MRI Wednesday and waiting to go see the oncologist Friday of next week. Can anyone share what I should expect from that appointment and or how to prepare myself. The week of waiting for that appointment will be hard enough but the unknown is killing me

Thanks

February 17, 2012 - 7:54pm
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By Anonymous December 19, 2011 - 7:38am

Hello Susan ;) Thank you for your quick and great response at that. Very much appreciated, I just dont know how I do this to mydelf time and time again, you know I have been through so much and still I try to please others instead of myself and instead of thinking what is best for me and what will make me happy. Thank you for comfirming that thinking of myself would not in any way be selfish cause sometimes thats how I feel when I think of me first. I always put others first, So I never realized the cost of that procedure which you can imagine being a single mom to say I cannot ever afford that, yah I thought the same about him knowing about me when he decided to be with me so perhaps he is ok with this you know, Of course he didnt know right away when he met me however hasnt left me yet and he has known for some time, sometimes I wonder though, like I said he only has one child and stated more than once that whats he gonna do just have no more children? Well it makes me feel guilty and I think Im at a point in my life where I cant do this anymore you know I am ready to be with someoen ad settle down, you made me realize that if this holds him back from being with me then perhaps hes not the one for me and does not love me as he says he does, anyhow thanks again for the response I think I am just going to let the situation be and hey well If I cant I cant right!! I would have hoped that he was happy I am alive and well you know.....God Bless and thank you again ;)

December 19, 2011 - 7:38am
By Susan Cody HERWriter Guide December 18, 2011 - 6:25pm

Hi onelove

Thanks so much for sharing your story with us and we're thrilled for you that you are back to good health again.

You know, we hear from women who are with men who want babies (when the woman cannot) quite a lot. It's either a 35 year old man wanting his 45+ girlfriend to start a family or men who know their partner is not medically able to have a child yet they talk about it quite a lot, thus putting pressure on the woman to do something that is not medically possible (or safe). We have had women close to the age of 50 who are feeling pressure to produce more children (even if they had several years ago) from younger partners. It makes me wonder why the younger men are with these women, wanting children, yet knowing their reproductive limitations. If these men are so keen on having children, then I don't understand choosing partners who have already completed their families and/or cannot have children. The pressure on women is ridiculous.

You've had four children and survived cancer. Your life is full and busy. You are robbing this man of nothing. Showing your love for a man is not limited to bearing his children. Women and men are together for love - many couples chose not to have children at all. Having a child with a man is not the ultimate statement of love.

Honestly, I am sure your partner is a nice guy but he is being selfish and unrealistic and needs to stop talking about this anymore. Even if you could adopt or have a baby via surrogate, it doesn't seem you really want a fifth child - you are only 29 with a very large family already!

The decision should be yours to make but please do what is right for you and your four children - don't have a baby to keep this man - a child will not make a family work -half of the children in America are from broken homes which will tell you something, and it seems like you many have gone through this yourself too.

I would hate to think of any woman feeling like they are letting a man down by not having children with him. He met you knowing you have several children already and are not physically capable of having children. If his wants his child to be biological then you will have to go via a surrogate so be prepared for that (as well as the cost which can be $20K all told). There is so much more to think about than just what he wants. This decision has to come from you and the most important aspect is the four children you have now, not your boyfriend. Their interests must come first and you must also think about your own health and happiness.

I'm sorry you feel so bad; you have done nothing wrong and you are not "robbing" this man of anything - you were who you were before you met him and he knew this.

I hope to hear back from you and good luck, this is hard, I know.

~Susan

December 18, 2011 - 6:25pm
EmpowHER Guest
By Anonymous December 17, 2011 - 8:46pm

Hello well I am 29 decided to join this group and share my story and feedback from others since the issue seems to arise, So I have four beautiful children and with my last child who is now almost 2, I had a pap that came back abnormal and soon to find out it was cervial cancer, first was the cone biopsy then the hysterectomy which I still have my ovaries which isnt very great cause I have pain a lot from the cysts bursting since my body of course is still trying to get me pregnet anyhow the hormonal thing I am grateful for....It really hasnt been an issue for me since the cancer is now gone and I thank God daily for that, however I was single and now I have found myself to meet a very very good man and he only has one child, although he loves mine, the question has came up about him sharing a child with me which is impossible since I had a hysterectomy and cannot have children, It has cause me to be depressed and sad and feel as If I am robbing him of something, I think he may feel the same way, being that I have my ovaries cant I still conceive like with a surrogate you know where they take my eggs insert his sprerm and someone just carrys the child for us since I have no cervix? Im sad and depreassed over the health situation but I never thought that i would want more kids since again I have four ;)

December 17, 2011 - 8:46pm
By Susan Cody HERWriter Guide April 19, 2011 - 6:39am

Hi again Jennifer

I'm sorry you got that phone call (and if the doctor said it's not looking good, I wish he had told you what's going on because it's probably torture to wait.) A week or two on vacation flies by but crawls along when waiting to hear test results.

Do you suspect your cancer has returned, Jennifer?

~Susan

April 19, 2011 - 6:39am
By Jennifer sheppherd April 14, 2011 - 12:42pm

Susan, I've been tested for all STI,they've all came back negative.as I stated in the post above I have had a form of hpv wich turned into cancer they treated me with cryotherapy & a biopsy I returned with a pap every 6 months & now this.. my mother had fibroids & my grandma had cervical cancer both had surgery..

My Doctor called me today,the results are in he wants me to come in 4.25.11 & talk about treatment said its not looking good

April 14, 2011 - 12:42pm
By Susan Cody HERWriter Guide April 14, 2011 - 8:03am

Hi Jennifer!

Thanks for joining!

There could be any number of reasons why this is happening. What kind of discharge do you have - meaning is it blood or yellow/green colored? Have you been tested for all sexually transmitted diseases? A bad odor is often caused by an STD.

Have you been having regular pap tests since you've had children? Since HPV doesn't disappear completely (although it remains dormant in most of us) it can reappear at any time, often when a woman is ill or under stress. Is this the case with you? You mentioned at the end of the post that you have had cervical cancer already - can you tell us the treatments you had for that?

You may also have fibroids or cysts and an ultrasound will hopefully find these if this is what you have.

I'm sorry you're in so much pain and please let us know the results of your tests as soon as you can.
~Susan

April 14, 2011 - 8:03am
By Jennifer sheppherd April 13, 2011 - 2:40pm

Abnormal pap 6 yrs ago now in Pain! waiting for my Ultrasound results

Hey I'm Jen,27 yrs young with 2 kids.when I was pregnant with my daughter 6 yrs ago the doc told me my pap came back abnormal I was frightened by what I heard,he then told me that because I was pregnant there was nothing that he could do until I had the baby.after my beautiful baby girl was born I then had a biopsy 1year after also followed the biopsy was cryotherapy which I found very uncomfortable everything went well after that up until march of 2010 is when the pain came excruciating ohboy! I began to have pain in my lower back as well as my lower abdominal area & pain with intercourse aswell as blood.my days are interrupted by pain & fatigue.uncontrollable discharge along with odor.I called my doctor an scheduled an appt then he told me test looked good everything is fine but he's concerned so he scheduled me an appointment to have an ultrasound wich was 4.07.11 I'm waiting for my results & Im so worried about what there gonna find! he asked do I have any kids & do I expect to have anymore..does any one else have any idea on what's gonna happen next..any support is welcome thanx.
J.Sheppherd Diagnosed with Cervical cancer 2005 Stage 0 carcinoma in situ.cryotherapy cone biopsy..in pain lower back abdominal region

April 13, 2011 - 2:40pm