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I'm a 20 year old girl, engaged, my parents divorced when I was 10, mum remarried with another man when I was 11, I do see my dad here and there and I've got 2 brothers from him. Since I was 15 my dad has been acting very close to me and has been sexual attracted to me. When I was 16 he assaulted me at his house and tried touching me and making me watch porn. At that time he just broke up wit h his fiance he had been with for 5 years. After he did that to me I stopped speaking to him and he told me that he only did that because he feels so alone and stressed that his fiance left him. My now fiance knows a few things about all this. I've only spoken to my dad here and there.. last year when I was 19 he told me that he fell in love with me and that he wants me and stuff like that . He also invited me over a few times and messaged me a porn video. I got so sick of it and told my mum and my mum went crazy and never spoke to my dad. My dad told her that he is mental and he doesn't know why he did all that stuff to me. We still talk here and there but just today he wanted to take me out to coffee with my brothers. We went out and I came back home where I live with my mum and step dad. My real dad has been messaging me his love story towards me and explaining how he wants to have sex with me and only wants me and all these stuff. I haven't replied to him I don't know what to do. I don't know if I should tell my mum all this again and even tell my fiance? Should I tell my fiancé about what my dad is doing again?
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Hello princess95,
I am deeply troubled by your story. I am glad you reached out to our community for advice.
You are a victim of incest. While it may be difficult to talk about, you should know that this is an issue that impacts many people. In the U.S., 44% of sexual assault victims are under the age of 18, and the majority of juvenile victims know the perpetrator. In fact, over 1/3 of perpetrators in cases of child sexual abuse are family members.
princess95, you must report this to your mother and your fiance. Depending where you live, you and your mother may be required by law to report this to the police, Child Protective Services, and Department of Human Services.
I strongly advice you to avoid all physical contact and any form of communication with your father.
You may encounter a range of short and long term effects that many survivors face. You may face additional issues related to your sense of safety and trust because this type of abuse often disrupts your primary support system, which is the family. There are support groups for survivors of incest as well as counselors trained in this.
Regards,
December 14, 2015 - 9:43amMaryann
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