Breaking up is hard to do. Whether it’s your first time experiencing a breakup or it’s your tenth time, it can still be a rough journey.
Luckily, Christine Hassler, a life coach and author of the upcoming book “Expectation Hangover: Overcoming Disappointment in Work, Love and Life,” is providing women everywhere with assistance in getting over one of the most difficult experiences in life.
Her book which is coming out in October, actually addresses the challenge of how to get over any kind of disappointment, including relationship disappointments.
Hassler coined the phrase “expectation hangover,” which is applicable to what women may experience during and after a breakup.
“I had so many of my own disappointments, and I realized that an expectation hangover is kind of similar to a hangover from alcohol,” Hassler said in a phone interview.
“You wake up and you have a headache from all the thinking you’re doing, you’re spinning in confusion, there’s regret, there’s lack of motivation, you ... have anxiety, your stomach may hurt, you just want to pull the covers over your eyes. It’s kind of like a similar feeling of just wanting things to be different.”
“People’s greatest suffering is when their reality doesn’t meet their expectations,” she added.
And as a result of expectations not being met during a relationship, some women might experience an emotional hangover and all the symptoms that go with it. However, this is the best time to start the learning process.
Here are Hassler’s 12 nuggets of wisdom to help women who are going through breakups, whether they are the dumper or the dumpee:
1) “I think first of all we have the expectation that a relationship is supposed to last forever, and that if it doesn’t we failed in some way, and that’s not true. Relationships are here to teach us lessons and to help us grow, and just because a relationship ends doesn’t mean that we’re a failure and it doesn’t mean the relationship failed. It just means it had, what I call in the book, an expiration date.”