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Rejection: What it is, How to Leave it Behind and Move on With Your Life

By HERWriter
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Mental Health related image Photo: Getty Images

Rejection is an unfortunate part of life we must handle, but life must go on so it is important to move on from rejection. However, some types of rejection can be more devastating than others and can keep us stuck in an unhappy place for quite some time until help arrives.

Experts have some advice for how to move on from rejection in your life if you are still stuck.

Karol Ward, a licensed clinical social worker, psychotherapist, motivational speaker, host of the Body-Mind Wellness Show, and the author of “Worried Sick: Break Free From Chronic Worry to Achieve Mental and Physical Health,” has her own definition of rejection.

“I define rejection as basically a big ‘No,’” Ward said in an email. “When you, your idea, your qualifications, expertise or offer is rejected, the other party is saying no to you. The reason for that no is varied. You might not be the right fit, not the right idea at this time, not the right match for a relationship or sometimes the other person is too cautious or blocked to accept you or your concept.”

However, rejection can be useful in some ways.

“Rejection never feels good, but it can be the great teacher about how we handle life's difficulties and how we grow as people,” Ward said. “Recovering from rejection and depersonalizing it over time builds resiliency. Rejection and the form it takes place in teaches us many things about the people, places and ideas that are healthy or not so healthy for us to be involved with.”

She has some suggestions for how you can get over your experiences with rejection.

“Time and the ability to process the feelings of hurt and insecurity that get stirred up by rejection [are ways to move on from rejection],” Ward said. “When we first are rejected, our perspective on why it occurred is skewed. We tend to react personally. With time, our perspective often changes [and] we gain a little distance, which allows us to see more of the factors involved in the rejection.”

The type of rejection you experience doesn’t necessarily change the way you advance from the situation.

“I think the solution [is] basically the same, [but] the length of time is what changes,” Ward said.

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We value and respect our HERWriters' experiences, but everyone is different. Many of our writers are speaking from personal experience, and what's worked for them may not work for you. Their articles are not a substitute for medical advice, although we hope you can gain knowledge from their insight.