Hi Science Nerd,
Thank you for your question and for finding EmpowHER. I'm sorry you have been dealing with this sexual incompatibility issue for so long. And why have you? You're dating. Mind you, I'm not a doctor or therapist. Im a firm believer that your teen and 20s (dating) years is a time to "try on" different men and figure out what's important to you, and what you want in a life partner. It's also the time to figure out what you want from life--career, lifestyle, etc. Sounds like for whatever reason, things aren't completely gelling with this man. Are you two sexual in other ways? Does he like being sexual at all? How is the rest of your relationship? Realize that you can't change him.
Sexual incompatibility (especially in a dating situation) can be a deal breaker, so take some time to yourself and figure out how truly invested in this relationship you are. He may be a great friend, means a lot to you, and there's no reason why you can't remain close. You deserve to be completely comfortable and happy in your relationship. If sex is important to you, and you're not getting it from this guy, you need to decide for yourself if it's time to move on.
You may want to check out EmpowHER's Sex & Relationship articles, other ASK questions like yours, or find an ]]>EmpowHER Group]]> to connect with women in similar situations to your own.
Good luck and let us know if you need additional support.
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Hi Science Nerd,
November 25, 2010 - 8:10amThank you for your question and for finding EmpowHER. I'm sorry you have been dealing with this sexual incompatibility issue for so long. And why have you? You're dating. Mind you, I'm not a doctor or therapist. Im a firm believer that your teen and 20s (dating) years is a time to "try on" different men and figure out what's important to you, and what you want in a life partner. It's also the time to figure out what you want from life--career, lifestyle, etc. Sounds like for whatever reason, things aren't completely gelling with this man. Are you two sexual in other ways? Does he like being sexual at all? How is the rest of your relationship? Realize that you can't change him.
Sexual incompatibility (especially in a dating situation) can be a deal breaker, so take some time to yourself and figure out how truly invested in this relationship you are. He may be a great friend, means a lot to you, and there's no reason why you can't remain close. You deserve to be completely comfortable and happy in your relationship. If sex is important to you, and you're not getting it from this guy, you need to decide for yourself if it's time to move on.
You may want to check out EmpowHER's Sex & Relationship articles, other ASK questions like yours, or find an ]]>EmpowHER Group]]> to connect with women in similar situations to your own.
Good luck and let us know if you need additional support.
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