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21 No Sex Drive

By Anonymous May 23, 2015 - 12:45pm
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I am a fit, healthy, 21 year old female, but I have no sex drive. I find I crave sex occasionally when single and in the beginning of a relationship, however after about 3 or 4 months have no desire to have sex ever. I don't even want my boyfriend to go down on me even though it is the only way I orgasm. I dread my boyfriend making moves on me and he complains I never initiate sex even though I find me initiating much hotter than him initiating sex. I want to want to have sex! Even if I was in the mood once a week or once a month I would be happy. I don't even think about sex and am not easily turned on. Once I start having sex though I can enjoy it.
What can I do to increase my libido? Are there possible reasons why I feel this way?

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Hello and thank you for sharing your question.

Low libido in women is usually multifaceted; partly physical and partly mental.  This makes it impossible to simply pop a pill and fix the whole problem.  Here are some reasons you may be experiencing a low libido.

Sociocultural influences: negative sexual images/influences/pressures through media or social interactions

low testosterone: testosterone in women usually peaks in their twenties, then starts to decline in their mid-twenties.  So even though it would be usual for you to have low testosterone at your age, it is still a possibility.

Medical causes: anemia, high-blood pressure, discomfort during sex etc.

Medications: birth control or other prescription drugs

Lifestyle factors: busy work schedule, financial stress, tiredness, too much exercise etc.

If you don't relate to any of these possible factors then you may consider a phycological approach.  Its important to take time to analyze yourself on a deeper level.  You may discover you had desires/fantasies you were unaware of before.  Imagine scenarios in which you do desire sexual interactions.  


May 24, 2015 - 11:08am
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