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Should I have sex with my boyfriend?

By Anonymous February 2, 2016 - 6:49am
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So I've been with my boyfriend for a year and half now and we both love eachother. most other couples at my school have already lot their virginity to one another. I'm 16. My boyfriend loves me very much and I know he really wants to take it to the next level. He recommends that I should get the pill and we should also use a condom but I'm afraid to get the pill as it is advised that people who stuffer migraines should not get it. I suffered a migraine a couple time before. There's also a risk of getting a blood clot. The reason why I'm so hesitant about having sex is because I think I have a fear of becoming preganant, as I've already had countless pregnancy scares despite being a virgin. I just don't know what to do...I want to make my boyfriend happy, but do I put myself first? has a year and a half been too long?

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HERWriter Guide

Hi Anon!

Thanks for your post!

Of course you put yourself first! At this age - always! It doesn't matter if you've been with someone for years, you are only 16, you're a kid.

You sound intelligent - you know the risks of birth control for your particular health issue and you already know you have a fear of pregnancy even as a virgin. Once you're sexually active this may go into overdrive.

A person needs to decide on their own whether to have sex but many questions are really statements and opinions masked as questions. I think you've answered your own question.

We speak to many, many teens who are having sex by 14 - their choice. But that doesn't make them cool or adult - in fact, we see just how young they are when they post over and over again about being scared about pregnancy. Mature sexually active women don't behave like that.

I'm sure your boyfriend wants to have sex but if he leaves you if you don't - trust me, you'll know you did the right thing. Have sex when you are physically and emotionally ready - as well as ready for both the benefits and consequences. Nobody can decide that but you. This is you body and your choice! Listen to what you brain and gut is telling you.


February 2, 2016 - 6:56am
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Susan Cody)

Thank you so so much! :)

February 2, 2016 - 10:45am
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