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Wasting my time with a guy who's moving?

By June 24, 2013 - 9:23am

I've been seeing a guy for the past 10 months. About 3 months ago, he told me that he's moving in the beginning of July to another state for work. I'm continuing to see him several times a week, at this point exclusively. He's told me on numerous occasions that he wants me to visit him (he'll be close to the beach), but there's been no discussion of any kind of long distance relationship, not that I would want that. My friends, therapist, and mom think I'm wasting my time by continuing to see him. Part of me agrees, but another part of me enjoys his company and wants to spend as much time with him as I can before he moves in two more weeks. I guess I'm torn between enjoying the "now" and looking out for my future. Am I making a mistake?

By HERWriter Guide June 29, 2013 - 11:26am

Abatista has given you some great advice!

Since he has encouraged to yosu "to visit" it may be that he has feelings more like friendship than relationship, but this could just be the way he talks. He may hope the relationship continues.

However, I wonder why he didn't consult with you before making such a big move? If he is serious about you, he wouldn't have made such a decision without talking to you first.

Make a move and clear up what his intensions are but also don't sit around waiting for him to decide - make your own decisions too!

Good luck to you!


June 29, 2013 - 11:26am
By June 25, 2013 - 1:53pm

Before you make any haste decisions I think you should take the time to sit down and talk with him about where he sees your relationship going. The worst he could say is he doesn't want to do a long distant relationship and you are clearly already preparing yourself for that result.
Communication is the key. It's up to you to use it.
If he does say he doesn't wish to continue the relationship as a couple once he's gone, then consider whether or not you believe the time you spend with him is worth spending time with him.
If you just genuinely enjoy spending time with him then perhaps wait until he leaves. Enjoy each other until it's no longer an option.

June 25, 2013 - 1:53pm

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