October 30, 2015 - 8:00pm
My boyfriend and I have been together for almost two years and, we used to have sex all the time, multiple times a week. Now, we have sex maybe once a month, if that. I have caught him watching porn multiple times and, I've told him it hurts me that he'd rather get off sexually to looking at other women than me, and he claims he is doing it as a strategy to help him last longer in bed with me. I have cried everytime that I have caught him and, he swears he will never do it again because, he knows it hurts me. I hate the fact that he can get off to the girls in porn and, maybe he won't have sex with me because, I look nothing like them. When he does this, it makes me feel fat, and small chested, and just not attractive. I will ask him and he will tell me we are going to have sex the next night then, when the time comes, he turns me down. He always claims he's too tired. It's to the point now where I think it's because I've gained weight that he doesn't want to have sex with me. I'll be spontaneous and start giving him head and he will get hard, or I'll be naked when he comes home, and he will still turn me down. It's like a really big blow to my self esteem when this happens every single time. This has happened more times than I can count.