When I was eight my father molested me.
When I got the courage to tell my aunt (mom's sister) this is what my mother said to me after she found out: "They (her parents) already don't like your dad." What is an eight year old supposed to do with that?
When I found out my father denied it I realized that I was going to have to pretend it never happened.
That's what I did for 20+ years. Held it in - acted like everything was fine. No one talked about it. Ever.
When I turned 30 I had a nervous breakdown and started therapy. I've been on anti-depressants for almost 20 years off-and-on and was hospitalized Dec. '09 for 12 days because the meds were causing suicidal thoughts.
I also have fibromyalgia, anxiety, PTSD, GERD, IBS and am emotionally stunted.
I'm writing in hopes to reach someone - someone who may be hurting.
I have been "stuck", unable to heal all these years. I am on disability for fibromyalgia, depression and anxiety. This is the third time. I am tired of feeling this way. I have a new therapist and a devoted boyfriend and I am DETERMINED to move past this pain.
If there is anyone that would like to talk - about ANYTHING - please don't hesitate to email me.
I am open to any questions, as well.
God Bless you all in your journey,
Here are some books that have helped me:
The Courage to Heal by Laura Davis
Allies in Healing (When the person you love was sexually abused as a child) by Laura Davis
Boundaries by Anne Katherine, MA
Learn to Relax (a practical guide to easing tension & conquering stress) by Mike George
You Can Heal Your Life by Louise L. Hay
Emotional Alchemy (How the mind can heal the heart) by Tara Bennett-Goldman
Surviving Childhood Sexual Abuse by Carolyn Ainscough & Kay Toon
Look Who's Laughing -stories compiled by Ann Spangler & Shari MacDonald
Books I've started to read/will read soon:
The Bait of Satan by John Bevere
Redeeming Love by Francine Rivers