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21 year old mom with no sex drive

By November 9, 2009 - 8:59am
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I'm 21 and the mother of a 18 month old energetic son.
My fiance and I have been together for 4 years and we used to have sex all the time. Usually once a day. Since being pregnant and having my son we've cut it down to having sex once a week, sometimes once every two, if we're lucky. I'm never in the mood for love making anymore and I just cant climax unless im manually stimulated.
I stay moist and its not painful when we do have sex, and I enjoy it most of the time, but even when we are having sex I cant stay 100% focused. How can I get back to the carefree ways when I loved to be intimate with my fiance.
I'm wonderng if anyone else has these issues.

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Susan gave you some great advice and information.

Fatigue from working a 24 hour job everyday (plus a paying job if you are not a SAHM) can certainly take its toll on you and sex may very well be the last thing on your mind. Do you and your fiance ever get a day to yourselves? If not, maybe you would consider having a date night once a week even if you just stay home and have some drinks or watch a movie together. Have a relative or someone you trust watch your little guy for a couple of hours while you and your fiance catch up, relax, and can be intimate without any stress.

It seems as though you are not able to relax and stay in the moment because there is something in the back of your mind-- whether it be home related, work related, or related to your toddler. Try to clear the mind before engaging in sex-- make sure everything is in order, the baby is being looked after or sleeping safely in bed and forget everything and everyone else-- just enjoy the sex.

Hope this helps and like Susan said, you may want to have your thyroid checked out as well as blood work because these may reveal any unwarranted remnants of having a child. Good Luck!

November 10, 2009 - 6:37am
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