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How to get a new sexual partner tested for STIs and etc?

By July 2, 2010 - 1:17pm
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I recently started a non-committal relationship with a nice guy. I don't want to have a serious dating relationship with him, but just casually enjoy some time with him without the pressure of 'strings attached.' Though, this is a new thing for me so, I need some information on how to go about getting him tested for any diseases.

I need help knowing how to ask him to get tested, and how I can get the results from him, without it being complicated or awkward. Also, what variety of tests should he take? Where can you typically have testing done? Can a walk-in clinic offer those services? How quickly can you get results back? And while I don't have any sexual problems, should I also produce test results for him?

I really don't want to get all serious and weird with him about this, though I don't want to jeopardize my own health by possibly having relations with someone who could be sick.


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EmpowHER Guest

Hi Pyridoxine,

I will have to admit that having such a relationship will never keep you safe even if you are tested and he is tested while you both may not remain monogamous. Sometimes it takes six months or more to detect a sexually transmitted disease. If you tread into the territory of casual sex, you should certainly always wear condoms for one safety measure.

You would have to go to a physician to be tested for all the possible sexually transmitted diseases. It may take up to a week for the results. There are laundry lists and I will provide you a link at the end. There is another STD that you will need to worry about if you are not in a monogamous relationship which is the human papillomaviruses (HPV), genital warts. There is no testing for this in men (as of now) they can only pass it along to women. As there are many stands of this virus. You may be playing with fire and could possibly even get cervical cancer from three of the different strands.

May I ask why you would want to put yourself at risk? There are plenty alternatives to casual sex. This is 2010 and there are plenty of safe alternatives! 

Here is a laundry list for you to be concerned about from the Mayo Clinic:

Let me know more about the situation.

July 2, 2010 - 1:35pm
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