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im having a sex problem

By September 1, 2010 - 11:03pm
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hi i have a lil problem when it comes to sex i have asked so many people online and no one has ever replied to me with an answer. ok here goes when i have sex i don't feel anything at all at first I thought it was because of the size of my boyfriend but we had broke up years ago and i started to date someone else and his a lot bigger the my ex and i still don't feel anything its not that i don't know his umm "there" its just theres no pleasure is it just me is there something wrong with me i don't know what to do its getting to the point i question if my boyfriend enjoying sleeping with me. how can he feel something that i cant, I try everything i can to not have sex with him because of this.

Add a Comment9 Comments

Hi Anonymous,
Here is an article I wrote about dyspareunia:
A fellow HerWriter wrote one about vaginal atrophy which also may help:
As Cary said, it may be a good idea to check in with a doctor to get to the bottom of the cause for your bleeding with intercourse, particularly to rule out any serious conditions.
Good luck and let us know how you're doing.

September 13, 2010 - 12:00pm
EmpowHER Guest


me and my boyfriend are having an issue. when we have sex it feels like the world but he will suddenly stop in the middle of the best times. and just pull out and go wash his penis. this has been going on for sum time now . and its all because i bleed while having sex.we dont have sex as much was we used to anymore

September 11, 2010 - 3:24am
(reply to Anonymous)

Hi Anonymous

It may be that the blood makes your boyfriend uncomfortable. Have you talked about this? Some people have a real aversion to blood, it can even cause them to pass out. I suggest discussing it and also it wouldn't hurt to have a gynecological checkup to find out why you bleed every time you have sex. That can sometimes be a sign of infection or irritation.

Good luck.

September 11, 2010 - 8:17am

Hi Whyme,
I wrote an article about low libido, hope it helps:
Here also is a book that may help:
If you have additional questions, please let us know. We're happy to point you in the direction to help get to the bottom of this problem.
Good luck and let us know how you're doing.

September 6, 2010 - 10:02am

Hello Whyme

I believe you are saying you literally, physically cannot feel when your boyfriend's penis is in your vagina? Do you have any sensation in your pelvic area at all? For instance, can you feel the sensation of urinating or inserting a tampon or anything else? Have you had a back or other injury?

If you have a total lack of sensation in that area, you may have a problem with a nerve. I suggest you see a gynecologist and perhaps a neurologist if this is the case. If I have misunderstood what you are saying, please let me know so we can figure out how to help you.

Thank you for writing.

September 2, 2010 - 6:34am
(reply to Cary Cook BSN RN)

well I can talk to me gynecologist about it i mean I don't know i can feel that his penis is in my vagina its just there's nothing after that there's no pleasure, sex means nothing to me anymore

September 2, 2010 - 10:12pm
(reply to whyme)

Okay, so you don't have a lack of sensation, you just aren't enjoying sex? Have you enjoyed sex before? Do you think you two are just not clicking sexually? Or do you think you have some other issue like depression or a lack of desire?

September 6, 2010 - 6:29am
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Cary Cook BSN RN)

simple...find a boyfriend with a bigger penis! it's called "a size queen" & there's nothing wrong with it. why do you think all the "kardashian" women date black men? dahh! everyone should feel it. when its right its tight & it doesn't matter how many or much you do it, it always feels tight.

September 13, 2010 - 1:00pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Anonymous)

What a jerk

October 14, 2010 - 4:09am
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