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My Boyfriend Gets off real fast during sex, why so?

By August 13, 2009 - 12:16am
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hes been with other woman before, and hes been my first and its been over a year almost two since he has had sex before me and hes gotten off real fast the two times weve had sex and he thinks im upset with him for getting off so soon and im not, he also thinks its where he hasnt had sex for a while becuase hes said before it would take forever. but now it doesnt, can someone help?

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Dear fobgchmeanslovee,

By "gets off" do you mean that he ejaculates prematurely? If so, one out of every 3 men suffers from this and it normally occurs to younger, inexperienced men. It is natural for him to feel bad about this, as he may feel he is letting you down. Reassure him that that is not the case.

Sometimes premature ejaculation is lifelong while other times it may be temporary or relate to another condition-- this is known as secondary or acquired premature ejaculation. The latter may develop after having previous relationships without any ejaculatory problems, like in the case of your boyfriend.

If your boyfriend is having problems with this, even though you are not, he may see his doctor for alternatives and ways to help delay the ejaculation. Many times, the doctor will not consider it to be premature because the range of normal from the beginning of intercourse to ejaculation is generally considered to be two to 10 minutes.

One thing that may help in the meantime is something called the "Start/Stop method"
During sex, your boyfriend takes control and whenever he feels like he may be getting ready to ejaculate, then he pulls out and waits a bit until the feeling goes away, then resume and continue to do this until your partner is satisfied and wants to ejaculate. It may be hard to do at first, but he is training himself to hold on a little longer, so it will take time.

Please read this with your boyfriend http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/premature-ejaculation/DS00578/DSECTION=causes for more information on premature ejaculation as well as what may be the cause.

Good Luck!

August 13, 2009 - 5:57am
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