The term “cougar” has recently gained popularity due to TV shows such as ABC’s Cougar Town, and celebrity women who date younger men. But, did you know any woman over the age of 40 can be a cougar…and it’s a wonderful thing?
Special guest, Linda Franklin, author of Don’t Call me Ma’am, joins our sexperts to discuss what makes a “Real Cougar Woman” sparkle like a 5-Carat Diamond. Watch below to find out how you too can embrace your sparkle and make your sex life shine.
Kristy Villa:
You know, these days the term ‘cougar’ is becoming more of a household word thanks to Courteney Cox’s popular TV show, and to celebrity women who choose to not only date but marry men who are many years younger than they are.
But being a real cougar isn’t just about an age difference in a relationship, it’s much more than that. In fact, our experts today say ‘any woman over the age of 40 can be considered a cougar’ and that is a good thing.
Joining us now for what sure to be a great discussion this morning is Linda Franklin, author and founder of TheRealCougarWoman.com and our two s-experts are back – Mary Wallace Jaensch and Rachel Braun Scherl from Semprae Laboratories. It’s good to have you back.
Rachel Braun Scherl:
Good morning.
Mary Wallace Jaensch:
Hi.
Linda Franklin:
Thanks for having me here.
Kristy Villa:
Love having you ladies and welcome Linda.
Linda Franklin:
Thank you.
Kristy Villa:
All right, so define ‘cougar’ to me.
Linda Franklin:
A real cougar woman is a woman who is smart, she is independent, she is confident and she refused to be defined by the age of the man that she is with.
Kristy Villa:
And she shouldn’t be ashamed of it, right?
Linda Franklin:
And she should never ever be ashamed of it. If she is happy; he makes her happy – they are happy together, that’s all that counts.
Kristy Villa:
I am happy. I am going to make a confession. I am a cougar. I am married to a younger man – seven years my junior. I have gotten a lot of heat for it Linda. I am going to be honest with you.
Linda Franklin:
A lot of women do.
Kristy Villa:
And why?
Linda Franklin:
Because it’s a double standard out there – what’s okay for the older man-younger woman isn’t okay for the older woman-younger man. It’s still a man’s world but we don’t care. We are doing it anyway.
Kristy Villa:
That’s right! Well I did it, so go there Kristy. What I’ll get is things like ‘oh you, you think…’
Linda Franklin:
Cradle robber?
Kristy Villa:
Yeah, and,”Oh, you did it for the sex, didn’t you?” Can you believe that?
Linda Franklin:
Well I can believe it but it’s certainly not the truth. It’s a myth. There’s so many myths attached to cougars it’s ridiculous, but a real cougar is a five carat diamond. She is very, very complex. She has five very important areas in her life and that is her health, her beauty, her relationships, her finance and her spirituality, and when all of those things are really working for her she is sparkling. She is glowing like that five-carat diamond.
Kristy Villa:
And it takes time to get there obviously.
Linda Franklin:
Yeah, it takes time. You can’t do it in your 20s, in your 30s, but from your 40s onward you are much more capable of achieving that happiness, that glow in your life.
Kristy Villa:
You are dying to chime in here.
Mary Wallace Jaensch:
Well I think part of it is that when you get to your 40s you can stop focusing on everybody else quite as much. Your children are older, you are more settled in your career, and it’s really an opportunity for you to take the time for yourself to find out what makes you happy to be the best you can be. It really empowers you and Rachel and I spend a lot of time talking to women about sexual satisfaction, and we think it’s fabulous that women are taking the responsibility for their own sexual satisfaction.
Kristy Villa:
Rachel?
Rachel Braun Scherl:
Amen!
Kristy Villa:
Amen to that.
Rachel Braun Scherl:
I hope that women don’t wait until they are 40 to start to know that they deserve and can achieve sexual satisfaction, but if it takes that and some opening of some space in their lives for them to be sexually satisfied and the confidence to know that they deserve it – that’s great, and I would say that a sexually satisfied woman probably does have a glow and looks happier and healthier. We see that in all our research, that it makes a difference if you are in a fulfilling sexual relationship.
Kristy Villa:
Absolutely. Now something I’ll get concerned about sometimes, and Linda you talk to a lot of women, so do you, over the age of 40, as you know, eventually maybe one day they will notice the age difference and when am 60 he is this, and when I am 70…yeah.
Linda Franklin:
But that’s a woman thing because the man isn’t focused on that and so you have to really get over it because it’s he doesn’t care. If you are this five-carat diamond he is so happy to be with that woman who understands herself, who understands her life, who appreciates him for the man that he is that they are really not thinking about the age difference.
In fact, so many women that I talk to, the age doesn’t even come into it until they are almost to the stage of having a very serious relationship. They just connect, just like in any other relationship. You meet someone. You date someone. You actually connect, and then maybe the age thing will come out eventually, but it’s certainly not top of the priority.
Rachel Braun Scherl:
It sounds so good. I think everyone is going to be doing it.
Kristy Villa:
Now Rachel, we talk about empowerment and control and cougars, you know, we have that and I do think even in the bedroom there’s ways of even adding more of va-voom, isn’t there?
Rachel Braun Scherl:
Absolutely, and one of the concerns that women have as they get older, over 40, over 50, is the changes in their sex life for menopause. It’s a common concern. For some women there is a change but that doesn’t mean there aren’t options for them to bring the va-va-voom back in the bedroom. If their heart is still in it, if their mind is still in it and their body can still respond there are plenty of options, like a product like Zestra, which you can apply topically. It’s hormone-free, which is really important to women over a certain age, and it improves arousal, desire, and satisfaction. That sounds good at any age.
Kristy Villa:
Final touch here.
Linda Franklin:
I think it sounds good to me.
Mary Wallace Jaensch:
I think what’s really important is that cougars tend to get described as ‘women pursuing younger men’ and in reality if you are one of these five-carat diamonds you are attracting those men because of who you are and how good you feel about yourself.
Rachel Braun Scherl:
I think cougars need a remarketing campaign. That five-carat diamond thing really works.
Kristy Villa:
You ask my husband. Did Kristy come after you or you go after Kristy? He came after to me.
Linda Franklin:
Absolutely.
Rachel Braun Scherl:
Now the truth is out.
Linda Franklin:
Amen sister, the truth is out.
Kristy Villa:
Thank you so much. I’m out of the cougar closet. Oh my gosh, ladies thank you, it was a lot of fun and we will see you next time, right? And if you want to read Linda’s book “Don’t Ever Call Me Ma’am!” – don’t ever call me ma’am, or for more cougar information just check out Linda’s website, therealcougarwoman.com and for more tips on how to empower your life or your sex life, go to Zestra.com.
Today’s show is brought to you in part by Zestra – a natural blend of botanical oils and extracts, clinically proven to enhance a woman’s desire, arousal and satisfaction. Experience the ‘Zestra rush’ for yourself.
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