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Choosing Celibacy Over Sex

By HERWriter Guide
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"Sex is natural
Sex is good
Not everybody does it
But everybody should."

So sang George Michael on his huge hit “I Want Your Sex.”

To deny sex, he said, is just plain unhealthy. But not everyone feels the same way. It’s hard to believe it, in an era where every newspaper, magazine and website is obsessed with sex. How much we have (or don’t), how good it is, and all the positives and negatives attached. But we’re not all having sex, of course. At least not with other people. Some of us are in between relationships, aren’t really bothered with sex right now, or are even in romantic relationships that have lost their mojo.

So what about those who choose a long period, or even a lifetime of celibacy (the term for chosen celibacy is Brahmacharya) ? Are they more spiritual, more connected to their inner core and less distracted by the drama that sexual relationships often offer up? Well, they certainly may be if they choose celibacy, according to many who advocate the practice. They believe that we humans have becomes slaves to sex (do they have a point?) and servants to our physical desires. Many groups who choose Brahmacharya as way of life use Eastern (often Indian - ironically the same country that gave us the Kama Sutra) techniques and belief systems.

According to a Hindu belief, the practice of Brahmacharya leads to Brahman – the permanent and all-consuming universal reality. In other words, nirvana- here on earth. Complications and earthly temptations and distractions are lifted and practitioners are free to experience true and pure life. Intimacy with self leads to ultimate contentment. Lest we think this whole concept is impossible or just plain silly – the age old tradition has indeed given genuine happiness to many of its followers- some of whom are devout for life. And it’s not all about spirituality either. Some choose celibacy simply as a preferred way of life, just as some choose sexual activity.

For those who don’t think this way of life is for them, there are many reasons to have as much sex as possible!

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EmpowHER Guest

I have chosen celibacy at 25, for a handful of reasons. The reasons for each person are different but I will tell you that I do not regret my decision at all. I have found a deeper sense of self, a whole new level of enlightenment, happiness and a completely astonishing zest for life. I have been more productive, kinder and just all around a better me.

September 26, 2012 - 9:38pm
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We value and respect our HERWriters' experiences, but everyone is different. Many of our writers are speaking from personal experience, and what's worked for them may not work for you. Their articles are not a substitute for medical advice, although we hope you can gain knowledge from their insight.

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