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I have been married for 11 years. My husband suffers from depression and is on medication. When he does not get enough sleep, he becomes extremely annoying and there are times he becomes verbally abusive. Before the medication it happened more often.

By Anonymous May 30, 2016 - 6:39pm
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We have twin eight-year-old girls and they now see this. We just spent a weekend camping and he was in a horrible mood the entire time and ruined it for us. He doesn't call me names but he makes smarta$$ comments to me in a condescending way. He speaks very rudely to me. When I call him out on it, he says "this is the way I am, if you don't like it, you can leave." Yet when he is well rested, he will write me a card that says I deserve so much better. I know that I do! When he's well rested, it is all good. But he doesn't do a good job of taking care of himself. I'd like a commitment from him that he will do so!

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HERWriter Guide

Hi Anon

Thank you for sharing your story. We have a very active caregiver thread that I will link you to, if you're not in it already.

I'm sorry you are your family are going through so much. Now that your twins are older, as you said, these troubles need to stop as it may affect their adulthood to a negative extent.

Sleep is a huge factor in the quality of our lives and your husband's lack of it is certainly proof of what goes wrong when we don't get enough rest. He also sounds like he cannot control his anger.

Most hospitals have sleep clinics where they evaluate sleep patterns and quality of sleep. He needs to call and see if this can be done. Cognitive behavioral therapy and medication may also help.

We all feel lousy when we don't sleep but he still doesn't get a pass for his ill-treatment of you. He needs to work harder.

Check out this link for support (the leaving part may not affect you) as I think it's helpful to know you're not alone: http://www.empowher.com/community/ask/living-and-possibly-leaving-sick-spouse-heartfelt-story-reader-looking-advice


May 31, 2016 - 5:07am
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