Facebook Pixel

Lifetime of being in an arranged marriage EASIER than wearing a condom for a few moments?

By September 4, 2008 - 1:09pm
Rate This

I can not figure this out, and would love your thoughts!

I just read this story on Nigeria arranging marriages based on positive HIV-status. Basically, to stop the spread of HIV, the solution is to pair HIV-positive couples together (they can say "no" to a potential mate), in hopes they will no longer spread HIV to others.

Health experts are saying this is a bad idea, for so many reasons. The solution they seek is: wear condoms when having sex!

I was surprised that people would rather be paired in marriage by the government...instead of wearing a condom?! When you think about it: condom-wearing lasts, what, a few minutes...or 10 minutes if you're lucky?! Marriage lasts, (in this scenario) a lifetime?! It just doesn't make sense to me that people are so against wearing a condom for a few moments that they would prefer to just be paired off for the rest of their life?!

My question is: what is the big deal in wearing a condom? Why are people so against wearing them?

Add a Comment3 Comments

EmpowHER Guest

I guess being paired up with each other is better than being some kind of outcast, though. And they do get to choose whether to be with the specific person...is it really that different from STD dating websites?

January 27, 2009 - 8:11pm
EmpowHER Guest

I will take a different approach on this subject...I think many women are allergic to some condoms although there are lambskin instead of latex which is the most common of the alergic reactions.

To be paired up due to status of HIV class is a bit communistic isn't it? I understand completely there is a growing problem with HIV in Nigeria, not as much as Kenya, but I think education would be a better approach then arranging marriages to stop the spread.

September 6, 2008 - 11:45am

I think the condom issue is more of a male issue than a female issue. Let's not forget that in conflict-torn areas of Africa, women of all ages, including octogenarians, and very young girls are routinely raped and mutilated by roving bands of ignorant, illiterate pseudo-militia. Surprisingly enough, these same men would kill those who would attack THEIR women!

OK, I went off on a bit of a tangent. Men still try to push the responsibility off onto women in our society - so many excuses for not making the effort for safe sex. I fear for my daughter...

September 4, 2008 - 5:28pm
Enter the characters shown in the image.
By submitting this form, you agree to EmpowHER's terms of service and privacy policy
Add a Comment

All user-generated information on this site is the opinion of its author only and is not a substitute for medical advice or treatment for any medical conditions. Members and guests are responsible for their own posts and the potential consequences of those posts detailed in our Terms of Service.

Sexual Health

Get Email Updates

Resource Centers

Related Checklists

Sexual Health Guide

HERWriter Guide

Have a question? We're here to help. Ask the Community.


Health Newsletter

Receive the latest and greatest in women's health and wellness from EmpowHER - for free!