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Q: 

My boyfriends sex drive has gone!

By Anonymous October 5, 2011 - 5:04am
 
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I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 1 and a 1/2 years, 1 year of that was long distance. I am now living with him, and our sex life has dropped dramatically. It has gone from 5 times a day to maybe once every 4th day. I understand the honeymoon period wears off, but this is ridiculous. He works a monday to friday job, he is just always tired, he will be home at 7pm, then asleep by 9pm. I have brought it up with him several times, as its effecting me. He says that it has nothing to do with how he feels about me, he loves me and extremely attracted to me, but he is just so tired. I have never seen someone sleep 10 hours a night and still be exhausted every night! I have tried dressing up, lingerie, dirty talk and sexy pics via text and being naked when he gets home, it only gets him going for one night, then we wont have sex for several nights after that. I even try to get him to tell me his fantasy's and desires and he just says he loves everything I do, we are both 25, so i'm just confused as to why this man has no sex drive, or where it has gone or how to get it back. I have a high sex drive, I love being intimate with my partner frequently. And this is taken a toll on my own sex drive, I feel unwanted and neglected and its also making me paranoid and jealous. I don't know what to do and where to go from here, if this is what he is like at 25, I would not even want to know what he is like when he is 40! I love him dearly, and he is the most amazing boyfriend, but this is making me doubt our relationship. Please help :(

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Hi Anon,

Do you work? A man that works monday through friday until 7pm is not always going to be up for sex every night no matter how hard he tries or how young he is. It has nothing to do with him not being attracted to you, he's just tired. If it makes you feel better, you should make an attempt to talk to him and come to a happy medium where you were to get more sex (on weekends, perhaps) and he were to get his rest during the week.

Try not to let this make you paranoid, it's normal. Unless he is giving you a real reason to be jealous and paranoid--don't be.

Best,

Rosa

October 5, 2011 - 7:00am
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