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My husband is not interested in sex

By Anonymous July 1, 2016 - 1:14pm
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We have been married for 22 years and known each other for 28 years. In the begining we were very sexually active with each other but it started going down hill soon after we were married. We are very close to each other and we still love each other I'm just not sure if it is the kind of love a husband and wife have. I still find him attractive and still want to be intimate with him but that doesn't seem like he feels the same way ab out me. I know there is no other woman in his life. I always know where he is, either at work or home with me. We are best friends and enjoy being with each other and do things together. If he ever wants to do something without me that is fine also. I am not the controlling type and he knows that. I really don't know what the problem is. When I ask him why we don't have sex very often he tells me he just doesn't think about it that much. I tell him if he really loved me then he would want to be intimate with me and he would miss me if we hadn't been for a while. He says he doesn't know why he doesn't think about it that often,he justn doesn't but he insists that he still loves me and wants to stay together. What can we do? Is there anyway this is normal? How can I stay with him if he doesn't make me feel wanted and attactive?

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Hello Anonymous,

Welcome to EmpowHER. Thank you for reaching out to our community with your concern regarding your husband's lack of interest in having sex.I am glad that you approach the subject with him. You must respect his answer that he just doesn't think about having sex.

Do you sense your husband has any concern about his lack of interest? If so, he may want to speak with his primary care physician to rule out a physical cause, particularly erectile dysfunction.

Another factor is age. How old is he? Fatigue from general aging to work related coupled with lower testosterone levels may play a role.

Maybe, you can share your feelings with him. Keep it brief. You lose a man's interest when talking about feelings within five minutes. Keep your emotions in check. Don't bring it up often or persist. He may interpret that as nagging.

Most importantly, enjoy the loving relationship and enduring marriage you share. Make the most of the time together doing the things you enjoy.


July 1, 2016 - 1:27pm
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