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Is there someone else that my guy is interested in? How can I tell?

By August 20, 2009 - 7:12am
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My b-f has been pretty uninterested in sex for the last few months. As you can see in my other questions, it's a bit of a roller coaster. We have been together for over 2 years (living together for this time as well). I am a really loving and attentive g-f, but am quite independent. I probably do TOO much for my guy, but that's the type of person I have always been. Anyway, this morning I was trying to please my guy b-c it has been about a week since he has done his thing. He finally reached the point of, you know. It took him awhile, and he kept getting frustrated, saying he didn't want me to work hard to make him feel good. I told him to just relax and enjoy, that I didn't mind. I have been really patient, but everytime I try to make him feel good, he just says that he feels too much pressure to perform. I don't ask for much, so I'm confused. I still remain loving and sweet. So after this morning's event I am making breakfast and I bring it over to him and he is looking at a picture of some girl on his phone. It wasn't clear who it was, but it wasn't me. After that I acted somewhat distant and quiet. If you have read my other things then you prob know where I am coming from. He asks what my problem is (I don't even think he knows I saw the picture). I am so irritated that I do everything for this guy, meanwhile he's looking at a photo of some other girl that's in his phone. He's been very loving to me, but I onder if it's all a front or if I'm just a jealous freak. Any advice? Thanks so much!!

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Hi Tina,
I lost my job about 2 months ago, and my guy lost his job last October. He has an at-home business that he works very hard with and also does great. I have money saved and use that towards our bills and groceries, so we are able to make it. Although I am unemployed, I am out of the house job hunting and with my kids a great deal of the time, so I'm not just at home wanting to be entertained. He said he really likes when I am home, even though he is outside most of the time working on autos and motorcycles. Also in the last month I applied for a state job, took a test and did very well. There are about 5 more steps in the process, but if I get this job there is a good chance I will be working midnights or afternoons. In regards to the picture, I didn't say anything about it. He likes to be the center of attention, and when we are at the gym he wants everyone to be looking at him. I'm very much the opposite. I keep to myself, put on my IPOD and focus on my workout. I'm not sure other than that what has changed. I still wait on him hand and foot and it seems to me that I meet his needs?

August 21, 2009 - 11:16am

Hi fitgirl, thanks for writing and many women have experienced what you're experiencing. Here's a few questions for you:

Has anything changed in your relationship that would cause your boyfriend to act differently?

Has he experienced anything outside of the relationship that could be causing him excess stress or pressure?

Have you chatted with him about the photo on his phone before? If so, what did he say?

August 21, 2009 - 10:08am
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