Me and my boyfriend have been dating for almost 9 months. Our sex life was really great in the beginning, but recently I've noticing it tapering off a lot. We had a long distance relationship for about 3 months while I was in school. Over half of the time I try to initiate sex, he always pushes me away. He'll tell me that he is too tired, full, hungover, basically every excuse in the world. It's not like I even try very hard, sometimes I'll turn over in bed to kiss him and he will tell me, that he doesn't want to and will be obviously annoyed. This in turn gets me so upset and worked up about the problem. When I asked him about it, he claims that it isn't me, but that he just doesn't have as strong of a sex drive as me.
I'm pretty sure this isn't the case though. I know he masturbates quite frequently, and it seems like instead of having sex with me he is doing that instead. Ashamedly I looked at his computer to see if he was watching porn or anything like that, and of course I found a whole bunch of it in his search history.
I'm feeling hurt and it is constantly an issue with us. I know that by bringing it up all the time with him that I am only making the situation worse. I just don't know how to resolve the issue, because every time I lay in bed with him it's the only thing I can think about, when he goes to take showers I know that he is probably going to masturbate. I'm generally a very insecure person in relationships, and knowing that my boyfriend would rather watch porn or take these long showers than have sex with me makes me feel even worse. It seems a lot of the responses out there say that it's a sign your partner doesn't want to be with you anymore and that they are emotionally distancing themselves from you. I'm just worried that this is the problem.
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