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Why doesnt he want me?

By Anonymous August 14, 2010 - 3:36pm
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Ive been with this guy for 5 months now, everything is going good except for the sex. The first few times when we started dating were great and since then its less and less. Theres always some excuse that hes tired or doesnt feel good or is too sore. Hes a healthy guy, excersizes regularly and eats a healthy diet, i dont see a reason or cause for a low sex drive; Especially at the age of 24. To be honest but not conceded i am an attractive female and he tells me im great and beautiful and sexy and i have a great body and what not. I also found out i am pregnant with his child i have put on a little weight but im no bigger than a size 5. even still it was happening before this.i just dont get it. I dont know if im doing something wrong...i hint i touch him i ask him i play with him i dress up sometimes even beg and he just kind of laughs it off like im joking..am i joke? Is he cheating, is it the pregnancy..ive tried to talk to him but he just says the same things..i tired, im sore, or laughs..what does it mean or how do i get him to tell me the truth? I want him all the time, so much it almost hurts emotionally and mentally not to mention the physical frustration, bc he doesnt seem to want me the same. theres no passion, he doesnt even ever make out with me..does anyone have any ideas?!!!

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HERWriter Guide

Hi Anon,

Thanks for your post!

There are so many reasons as to why your boyfriend may no longer interested in your sexually. Some men fear harming a baby by having sex, others just don't find the idea appealing.

But one thing you must really think about is the idea that you and he are having a baby after only dating for a few months. That is very concerning and a mistake on both your parts. No baby is a mistake but many pregnancies are - to do this right at the beginning of a relationship is adding stress and worry in a time when you should still be going to the movies and getting to know each other as a new young couple! Your boyfriend may have intense regret about this pregnancy or fears for the future.

His attitude to you is not something he can fob off with laughter or making up stories about being tired. He is healthy, he works out and I don't believe that he is too tired at all - and nor do you.

He needs to stop making jokes now. He is going to be a father and partner with you to raise a child. I really don't think sex is the issue here, I think the relationship is and your entry into parenthood.

This does not mean your relationship is doomed! You can both work through this and any couple who are both willing to put the love, work and time in, can emerge stronger and better than ever.

But please sort this out before the baby comes or your relationship may disintegrate.

How is he in other areas? Does he cuddle you, kiss you and spend his time with you? What does he do when he's off work? What has he said about the baby's arrival?

Please update us soon and we're here to help you further!

August 14, 2010 - 5:01pm
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