December 10, 2011 - 1:44am
WHY, WHY..... If you say you are in pain, if you can't do what you love to do, if you become "different" against your will, then why "is it because we want more attention?", or "can really hurt that bad", or "using it as an excuse to not..." And WHY doesn't someone close to us stand up for us? Some may have these privileges. And at tiimes, I do. I have a wonderful husband, but he has no idea how to stand up for me. As an abused child, he has learned not to ruffle waters. But through counselling, he is much better. But, something that hasn't changed, is he just can't stand up for me in front of his controlling mother, or if someone says anything in person. It's not that he doesn't love me....that is very clear, but does anyone have anything that I can help him understand that loving me in my eyes, is standing up for me - with family, friends... There are times when, if he just would say something, that many "rumors" would not get started. When he writes to friends/family, or talks to them, he doesn't express how bad there is pain, and so we have had no support, emotional and otherwise. Which has caused him to become very stressed, and has made things worse. He would rather us or me suffer, than to tell someone (such as his mother) that things are going bad. When rumors DO crop up and we find out about them via very good ways, there isn't a move to try to correct any of them, even tho there are sometimes things that could be done that would correct some. He is as hurt as I am, but I can't fight these battles alone, as it just adds fuel to the fire. We do have good friends, but Pain does pick your GOOD friends from your "fair whether" friends. Any comments? Thanks.