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Could I be pregnant, stressed or with cyst?

By Anonymous November 19, 2016 - 6:42am
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Hey everyone!
Need help badly. Im sorry if this is going to be long... Pls bear with me as I give you all the details of my condition because I want you to have a clearer picture.
I am 34 years old, and my bf is 45
I want to ask whether I could get pregnant from the following scenarios:
July 24 - 29 => Period (not sure about the exact days but I remember still wearing the pads last July 29 although no more blood was coming out. My periods typically last 5-7 days)

August 29 - September 3 => Period
September 8 => Traumatic incident (attacked by stranger inside the home. Unable to sleep well for 3 weeks)
September 12 or September 25 => Very high fever, 40 degrees C
September 19 => Non-penetrative sex, bf ejaculated at my inner labia, vaginal opening, about three times. But prior to this, i did not have my usual ovulation symptom (tender breasts)
(A week after this, i had vaginal spotting, brownish in color. I thought my period was coming on September 29 or so, so I paid it no mind. Brown discharge mid cycle is really normal for me)
October 9 => Non-penetrative sex, bf ejaculated at my inner labia, vaginal opening, also about three times. Brown discharge still on going even as we had sex play.
October 23 => AM: Brown discharge stopped. Nighttime: Lower belly cramps, hot flushes, tender breasts (net says i could be ovulating or having implantation). Stress and anxiety very high.
Nov. 3 => Period. Mild then heavy on First day. Very heavy on the second day with clots and mass. Bad cramps from first to 3rd day. I thought volume was normal because AF skipped last Sept. Period lasted for 6 days, as usual.
Nov 15 => I have lower belly crams and tummy rumbling. Excessive gas. Still very anxious and extended anxiety over the possibility of pregnancy.
Nov 16-19 => ovulation-like symptoms, sensation of pulling, or throbbing in lower belly. Tender, heavy/full breast, ewcm slightly yellow and stretchy..


1. I had genital rubbing with my boyfriend last September 19 and October 9, and in both instances he ejaculated right at the opening of my vagina.. we never had full penetration as I am a virgin and want to remain that way until marriage. Stupid as this may sound, none of us really knew one can get pregnant that way, and to think we are way past our 30s already! I am 33 and he is 45.
2. I cant tell you about my cycles because I never bothered plotting. The dates I gave you were the only ones I can remember. I’ve been single, and never had sexual encounters prior to my boyfriend. As far as I know, I used to be irregular, but maybe my periods have gotten more regular in the last six months?
3. Last August 29, I had my period, which as usual lasted for a week.. Then on September 8, I was attacked by a stranger right inside my home, so you can say I was under a lot of stress and trauma. 2 or 3 weeks after, I was sick with fever that reached 40C. So anyway, my period didn’t arrive in September 29 (or around that time) as it should.. Instead, I got brown discharge that probably lasted for 2 or 3 weeks. The discharge started lightly, and then became somehow “heavy”, thick, and watery. Sometimes it was accompanied by blood, sometimes just the thick consistency. I couldn’t remember when this started, but it stopped around October 23, and that very night, I experienced cramps in my lower belly. I checked the net and it says I could either be ovulating or an implantation is happening in my womb. Of course I was scared shitless because I live in a society where unwed mothers are considered a disgrace to family no matter the age. Anyway, during that time, my breast started getting sore and my pimples started appearing (my usual PMS sign).
4. To my relief, my period arrived in November 3, which started off brown in color (this is normal for me), and became heavy mid-day. By the second day, my cramps were killing me (this is also usual) and the flow was heavier than usual, with lots of clots (but not bigger than a quarter) and some tissue, or mass.. I was thinking it could either be a regular period only heavier because I skipped a month, or I was having a miscarriage due to stress.. Anyway, the period lasted for five days (my usual is four) and blood gradually tapered off during the sixth day..
5. As far as I can recall, I was not ovulating during our intimate encounter last October 9. Even if I was not plotting, I knew that I didn’t have breast soreness between my August period and October 9. I only felt the soreness on October 23. And on October 9, I was already having heavy brown discharge even as he came on my opening. This discharge went on until October 23.
6. Although our intimate moments are so far in between, he ejaculated repeatedly outside of me during those two separate dates. Maybe three or four times, I just cant recall..
7. If it was on September 19, I would have been almost 2 months pregnant now, but if October 9, then maybe I am just three or four weeks along.
8. So far, I have not experienced any fatigue, or morning sickness (except light-headedness, which I can also attribute to hyperacidity due to extreme fear, I have been unable to sleep for 2 weeks prior to my Nov 3 period). I have a backache, but it has been here since the beginning of August, and it is more on the sternum, which I can only feel every morning. I have no unusual food cravings or aversion, and my breast have started going back to their original size after swelling a bit during (ovulation?) and menstruation. However, the itchiness in my nipples is still there, and I remember having this before, I just couldn’t remember if they were before, during or after my period.. so far, I have not noticed any change in color or size of my areolas, there have been no changes in my waist, and my weight remains steady. Actually, it dropped 4lbs prior to my period due to stress, but now I am back to my usual 69kg.
9. However, since my period ended, I sometimes feel a twitch in my lower abdomen, left side (like a muscle or nerve being pulled) and some dull pain in my breast (though they are no longer sore or heavy-feeling). I have been gassy, and seem to be producing extra saliva..
10. Months before these entire scare happened, I once had intense pain towards the end of my period, which caused me to pass out. So I am thinking that these little cramps could also be “normal” or if not normal (cyst, endo, etc) at least non-pregnancy related.
11. My stress and anxiety level have also been unprecedented. I have never been afraid my entire life and my sleeplessness has extended until now (Nov 14) even after my period. I am in constant lookout for morning sickness, which could also be the reason why I have been feeling light-headed lately. My hyperacidity has also kicked in and im forced to take antacids every now and then.
12. So my question: What are the chances of my being pregnant without penetration? Also my bf is 45 and I read that motility of sperm decreases with age. I have not yet taken a pregnancy test, because to do so would send me reeling into panic universe. I will, eventually, but only when we already have a back-up plan in place, which will probably be a month from now..

Thank you so much for taking the time to answer my question .

Add a Comment3 Comments


Dear Anon,

Thank you for reaching out to us.
I'm sorry you are in such distress. Anytime you have unprotected sex, you risk becoming pregnant. So keep this in mind. There are many resources here, on EmpowHER, about birth control.

It's unlikely you are pregnant if your boyfriend did not penetrate/ ejaculate inside you. However, you have a lot going on. I would strongly suggest you make an appointment with your gynecologist and have a thorough checkup. Your doctor will probably want to do a blood workup as well as test for pregnancy. Though you can test for pregnancy yourself for your peace of mind beforehand if you like. You may want to seek counseling because of the attack in your home.

Let us know how are you doing in the future.

All the best,

November 19, 2016 - 10:58am
(reply to Helena)

Hi Helena! Sorry that I got back only now. I didnt realize I got an answer on this post, so I made another last Tuesday (Dec 13) also here at empower.

So anyway, just to update you.. Since my last period on Nov. 3, I've had another period this December 7. The flow is much lighter than my other periods in the past, but it lasted around the same time (6-7 days), however, on the 3rd or 4th day, I passed some really large blood clots, about three, and one was as large as the palm of my hand! Scary right?

And then three days ago, I somehow tried feeling my pelvic area, and I think I could feel a semi-hard surface, though i couldnt tell if it's rounded or what. I was again on full panic as it might have been a uterus I am feeling. Since then, I have been nauseated, very gassy and bloated (I hope only due to stress), and I couldnt curl in sleep because everytime I tried, the acid seems to go up my stomach. There is also a weird pressure in my pelvic when Im sleeping on my side - all these are happening inside of me while I was at the end days of my December period (5th to 7th day). Today is the 9th, there were no longer spots on the 8th day, but I still do feel the crazy mild pressure when i sleep on my side. So.... I'm really growing crazy with worry now...

I will schedule a Ptest two weeks from now. But meanwhile, I'm freaking out on and off :/

Thanks for taking the time to reply.

December 15, 2016 - 12:24am
Guide (reply to Gabie)

Hello, Gabie.

I really think you should see your doctor to investigate the symptoms you are having. I hope you will!


December 15, 2016 - 6:33pm
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