Relationship advocate Sonya Zepeda explains why a woman should spend time find a nice man rather than the "bad boy".
So let me give you some tips for spotting good guys versus bad guys. Number one, I have to say it’s okay to like a nice guy. I think a lot of women are always looking for that bad boy and it’s good to like the bad boy, but I think it’s important to know who a good guy is versus a bad guy or, and I think the biggest thing is a bad boy is sort of somebody who challenges you, doesn’t let you walk all over them, but at the same time respects you and gives you your freedom to sort of pursue your passions and your dreams. A bad guy is somebody who is very controlling and sort of doesn’t give you all your freedom.
I think a lot of times you see women who make sacrifices for the man that they love and then it doesn’t work out for them. I have had countless instances of girls who have given up their career or moved across country or done things of this nature for a man because they were “in love” and then as soon as they got there they broke up and then they wished that they hadn’t left the job that they were in or left their family or whatever it is.
So I think a good guy is somebody who really respects you, gives you your freedom, supports you in your passions and your dreams and is sort of there to be a teammate with you as opposed to controlling you and everything is all about them.
I think it’s no different than men liking women with an edge. We like a challenge. We like somebody who challenges us and calls us out on our stuff and doesn’t tolerate us.
I had an instance where I didn’t realize…I basically had been stalking, we’ll call it, a gentleman. Called him multiple times and then he called me back and I was in the middle of a meeting and said, “You know, I can’t talk right now. I’m in the middle of something. What do you need?” Kind of curtly, and I received this text from him that said, “let me get this right, you can call me all you want and I have to be nice, but then when I call you, you act like you are inconvenienced and things of that nature.
So I kind of respected that because he called me out on my stuff. I realized, “Okay, he’s right. I behaved inappropriately,” and he sort of helped to keep me in check. I really appreciated that because I think a lot of times you don’t take a look at yourself and realize what your own actions are and that can affect relationships as well.
About Sonya Zepeda:
She has played both the heartbreaker and the broken-hearted in this crazy world of love. Sonya has explored many methods for successfully recovering from the collapse of a relationship. She has put her heart and soul into finding out what does and doesn’t work in this process. Through family, friends and her own trials and tribulations with men, she has written an entertaining and educational break up guide that will help mend your heart, fill your belly and lift your spirits.