Sex Ed: Abstinence-only Versus Comprehensive — Which Is Most Effective?

I am in complete agreement with Diane as I am another Moderator with EmpowHer. The pregnancy scare questions and lack of knowledge about sex is pretty hairy at times as there are many times I sit here thinking about the possibilities of half of these kids getting pregnant since they have no clue the mechanics of sexual intercourse – pregnancy.

Parents need to educate their children as I can even remember in high school (sex ed), there was nothing I learned from the class that was a 'real world' situation. Of course, many things have changed since my high school years and I know kids now are more interested in oral sex since they think that will be safer then the full Monty, sort of speak.

I am very happy to be a part of this company and to try and help each and every teenager that comes to our site to ask these questions as I believe we have become an integral part in their lives. Education first...agreed!

i can say that the only best way to learn sex is for it to be relegated in home...Teachers cannot guide their students well especially reaching into the crucial topics especially if each students has their own understanding about sex or shall we say, their minds had been so stigmatized...Parents/Guardians can manage to teach their children about sensitive parts about it especially that, it is not sex education we must teach but it is sexuality education that encompasses everything....Yes, parents can also teach their children about values, morality and the real essence of sex....:)

As a moderator for EmpowHer, I'll weigh in with this: Never would I have imagined the number of questions from teens and twentysomethings who do not know the mechanics of conception, exactly what happens when you have a period, how to avoid getting a sexually transmitted disease, and, frankly, whether or not they are pregnant. We see these questions every day.

Yes, we all agree that abstinence is the only 100% foolproof way to not become pregnant. But clearly something more needs to be done. The questioners are not only worried, they are also terribly uninformed.

We get questions from girls who had unprotected sex and have had two or three periods since then but are still worried they are pregnant. We get questions such as the one from the young woman who worried that if a man touches his penis and then touches her genitals, she is pregnant. We have questions like the one who was 37 days late for her period and wondering if she should see a doctor, and girls with all the symptoms of pregnancy who have not told anyone. We get questions from male partners as well. We get questions from women who have "had sex with their clothes on" who want to know if they are pregnant, and those who have all the symptoms of an STD and are frightened beyond words. The most popular form of birth control among the young women who write us is withdrawal -- and that has a failure rate of 26%.

Somehow, some way, what we are doing now is not working. Information is not the enemy here.

In reponse to the comment by anonymous on 4-28, who is somewhat defending the abstinence policy in the US-

The history of this policy and it's backers make it clear that in no way, shape of form was it intended to keep young girls from becoming pregnant, or to encourage them to go on to higher learning and a better life. Starting in 1981 with the AFLA, it was designed to keep young girls from having sex, destroy abortion rights, make sure every sperm produced entered a fertile womb, and spread Christianity, none of which have anything to do with reducing the TBR.

Struck down by the courts for lack of seperation between church and state, it has been carefully crafted and re-tweaked over the years to continue on this path, ignoring all the social circumstance which force young girls to choose pregnancy- the economy, educational failure, sex abuse, poverty, male abandonment, adult males impregnanting teens and so on. It is indefensible, really, since everything adults tell the young to abstain from will be allowed to them as an adult. It's a sad, cruel joke, a waste of time, used by lazy, indifferent adults who ignore the truth and the reality of the problem.

As far as the "lasting consequences" of sex, a young person has far more to fear from auto accidents (59%) drowning (12%)fire (9%)cancer (13%) and firearms (5%), just to name a few. The TBR for the US, the highest in the industrialized world, is 4%. We really should be talking about abstaining from driving, swimming, matches, eating fast food, and keeping guns.

Teen pregnancy and the Teen Birth Rate (TBR) is a function of the Adult Birth Rate, poverty, sex abuse, physical abuse, violent and chaotic households, educational failure and several other dynamics. The high TBR in the US ( 40/1000) has nothing to do with teen morals, ethics, values, sex or even education, and everything to do with Adult morals and values. Teens are "forced" into social corners by adults, and one of the responses in pregnancy. It "stops " their bus, and they can now get on another one.

It is an Adult problem, and has been since the records have been kept.

And abstinence? Abstinence is a cruel, sadistic joke adults play on young people. Everyone knows it, especially the young.

Good article Lauren
Rick Machado
Public Speaker on Teen Pregnancy

You are absolutely correct that stigmatization of sex is not part of an abstinence-only curriculum. However, the approach — in my experience and in the experience of people who have conducted research — is that students feel alienated by the way sex is approached in such a curriculum and that it discourages them from asking other questions. In fact, teachers are prohibited from even answering a question about protection because it could impact federal funding that the school receives. So, the stigmatization is a side effect of the way that the education is approached. (Sex is for marriage and if you are doing it sooner then we will not educate you about what to do; that attitude in itself alienates the majority of students who are sexually active before the end of high school and leaves them unable to ask their teachers/professionals questions)

That said, your point that it should be up to the parents is 100 percent on the mark. Too often parents/guardians rely on the schools for sex education when in reality each family has its own guidelines and moral values, and it is important that parents make these known to their children. If parents were doing this more often, there is no doubt that it would only create a safer sexual environment with our nation's teenagers.

"When minors are told that sex in any way, shape, or form is dirty and shameful, it discourages them from being safe when they do become sexually active because it has been stigmatized."

Who is teaching that to young people? It's not in the abstinence education curriculum. They teach that sex is a great thing to be shared between two people in marriage, and that outside of marriage there are some very dangerous consequences. Our schools need to be holding young people to the highest standard, if parents want their children to learn about condoms they should be doing that at home.