I went to a fun bridal shower today but unfortunately cannot make the bachelorette party tonight due to other commitments.
It's going to be a fun time, with a dinner at a nice restaurant and an evening spent line-dancing at a country bar. I'm not into country music and can't line dance to save my life, which is probably what would make it fun! Those line dancers are really into their thing, so seeing a bunch of women screwing up every dance move might make for some fun amusement!
Coincidentally, I also just read an article about what really goes on at many bachelor and bachelorette parties and it's anything from a fun night with girlfriends for the bride I saw today, or something a lot, well, different.
In a recent Cosmo article called Confessions of a Bachelor Party Stripper, the stripper said that about 30% of the grooms are willing to engage in sexual activity with the stripper (s), and about 70% are unwilling. It also seems like the best man and other groomsmen are the instigators - trying to get the guy to have sex as his last "hurrah" before settling down to a life of (supposed) fidelity. One third of them are willing to engage in sex? That seems extraordinarily high. But a professional dancer would know more than me.
Of course, any man who is willing to have sex with a stripper for money, weeks before his wedding may not exactly plan on lifetime of monogamy with his wife.
Even without sex, the average stripper show at a bachelor party involves a lot of sexual activity, usually between two female strippers, with the men watching and cheering them on.
The groom usually gets a lap dance by a topless or naked dancer and he is usually shirtless. Most men at these parties do not consider this to be of a real sexual nature. The other men are then invited to get a topless lap dance and many accept, whether they are married or single.
Bachelorette parties are not always innocent affairs either. While many are simply a bunch of girlfriends like my friend, celebrating a fun night out with some good food and wine, and very dubious attempts at dancing, others employ male strippers who strip completely and some kinds of sexual activity occasionally takes place.
And not all guys go for sex. Many guys go to a sports bar or a ball game and enjoy an all-guy barbecue afterward, throwing back some beers and reminiscence about the good all single days that most are secretly pretty happy to say goodbye to!
Often times, news of these parties gets back to the other almost-wed and can cause havoc. Feelings of betrayal and disappointment occur and at it's worst, it's not unknown for a wedding to be canceled, especially when rumors abound and pictures surface on social networking sites or on email.
But this isn't always the case. Sometimes, both parties accept that "what happens at the party, stays at the party" and indulge in whatever activities they choose. It's considered a right of passage - a last opportunity to engage in activity that will then be rebuked and ended on the day of the wedding.
Tell Us
Did one of these parties negatively affect you or someone you know? Or do you agree with the premise that although they may be wild and of a sexual nature - it's a right of passage that every soon-to-be-married should enjoy without fear of getting into trouble?
Would you be ok with your partner engaging in one of these kinds of parties?
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Add a Comment28 Comments
I'm a male stripper in Chicago. Bachelorettes go out of their way to sleep with the dancers. I get texts from bachelorettes days after the party (and I presume weeks before they're getting married).
April 20, 2017 - 4:55pmThis Comment
Getting married in 12 days. My fiance just had her bachelorette party. I actually hoped she at least got head (she didn't). My party is next week. We're going to a fully nude strip club, and she's going with us. Btw, 75% of the attendees will be female - 2 of which (excluding fiance) I've slept with (she knows and has been present). She's hinted at the probability of a 3 or 4-some when we get back from the club.
Our honeymoon will be a group one - essentially a week-long orgy.
It's all about what you're into. :-)
April 18, 2016 - 10:26amThis Comment
Old article so I doubt anyone's reading but I thought I'd throw my two cents in.
I'm a physically fit guy who has bounced and bartended in the past. I've seen quite a bit. And females at bachelorette parties are BY FAR the worst. The truth is most males get a lap dance that is almost clinical in nature with a guy like me watching to make sure he doesn't lay a hand on the stripper.
Females? Oh look out. They come in three types. One the chick who knows what's going on is wrong and just watches. She's still guilty because she won't say a thing to the groom who's going to a baseball game because he's forbidden to have strippers at his party. She just watches her friend be a complete slut with a stranger and keeps quiet. The second is the girl who has no issues and throws herself all over him. The third (and most common) is the girl who acts all shy and innocent. She turns her head and covers her face and says "Oh my God! I can't believe you guys!" Then she proceeds to touch, rub, etc. I will always remember the last one I bounced at. I was so disgusted by the females I never worked one again. The bride to be played all shy. eventually she was picked up with her crotch in the strippers face and his head up her shirt and her hands everywhere.
In truth if a female i was involved in asked me to not go to a bachelor party I'd say "I understand. No problem. I'd rather be with you anyway." And things do occur that shouldn't although quite rarely. But this article and most of the comments are all about how bachelor parties and female strippers are so bad.Sorry "ladies" but BS. You are the worst. If any woman I am dating, married to, etc ever suggested she was going to a bachelorette party that's fine. When she came back home she'd find her s$%t on the lawn and the locks changed. There's only one reason females get male strippers no matter what excuses you make and how you try to shame the men who criticize it.
March 10, 2015 - 10:05amThis Comment
You're absolutely right!!! Was asked to strip at a bachelorette party about 10 yrs ago. I first accepted and did the research. Wow!!! I was stunned! This is when vids were first being uploaded and plenty were out there. And the articles what happens at these parties and what's expected out of the male stripper. I told the bride's maid what I would not accept. She said yes. I get there and go to a different room to get dressed and she's already breaking rules - no pics above the waist and her husband was there. And I had a girlfriend at the time and the guilt kicked in. I couldn't do it! Put my regular clothes on and left.
September 20, 2018 - 1:21pmThis Comment
I am a female and I could not agree with your response more! I never understood why these parties were considered ok in the first place. They say that it's a time to celebrate your last night as a single person. Except you are NOT single and haven't been for a very long time! In any other situation would this be acceptable behavior for a committed partner? Would it be acceptable to have a stranger rubbing naked body parts on you any other time? Hell no! It would be considered cheating! I just don't get it.
January 17, 2016 - 3:40pmThis Comment
Well, my wife to be masturbated a male stripper to orgasm and ejaculation at her bachelorette party. She told me about it right after her party, but I was not in the least angry or jealous. We have been married now for 33 years and have raised 4 children. There was one occasion where she masturbated a member of her sister's wedding party after we had been married for 5 years. At first she denied it, but others in the limo, where it occurred, told me and corroborated the whole thing. I think after that she slept with a guy at the gym, maybe a year ago, after 32 years of marriage, when I became overweight after 9 major surgeries. She later confided that she was disgusted by my weight, and she had "one daliance". You know, we really love each other and recently married off one of our triplets. To me, as long as the sex stays "physical", and she does not fall in love, tjen I really don't have a problem with it. It is natural to want to explore. I myself have not done anything, but my wife has said to me that she would be ok with me having sex with someone I was really attracted to, as long as I did not fall in love. I just really do not have an interest in sex outside of marriage, but I told my wife that it turned me on tjat other men found her so attractive and that she had orgasms with other men's penis and ejaculate inside of her or on her. I guess I'm a little abnormal in this regard.
December 30, 2014 - 12:17pmThis Comment
You sir, are a CUCK. Total beta male. You need to take a good hard look at your life.
June 3, 2016 - 12:11pmThis Comment
Well, Here is one that you haven't heard of. I told my friends specifically the rules and limitations and I didn't want strippers or anyone naked so they hired clothed hostesses to my all guys drinking binge. The hostesses came out in lingerie so they weaseled there way around my words. I felt generally bad about the whole thing and told my better half that it was ladies in slutty outfits. She got upset that I didn't tell them to leave from the outset. Well they were serving the guys drinks and I thought the guys were doing it for me and they seemed to enjoy it more then I did. I didn't touch any of them or make any absurd gestures the whole thing did disgust me but hey my morals are tweaked a little high. I then proceeded to get heavily intoxicated and we went out where I can't really remember much of proceedings but I came home face first into a mattress. Set the rules if they get broken feel guilty about it - something need to be mentioned somethings don't. Trust that you will always make the right decisions and move on.
November 10, 2014 - 8:11pmThis Comment
The best thing to do is have a joint party. I am not saying you guys should following each other around but in the same area that way if someone feels nervous about what the other is doing they can go the area where the other is rather that be in the same building different floor, same block different place, or etc.
June 3, 2014 - 5:30pmThis Comment
Most importantly you should be getting married because you truly love and want to spend your life with someone so if someone feels like they need to get the some action before a death sentence, really, they should not be getting married to begin with.
Male, 36, never married
April 16, 2012 - 7:40pmThis Comment