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ask: High Sex Drive: Normal or Abnormal?

By Anonymous
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Is there really such thing as a sexual peak when you hit at a certain age? I have been pretty promiscuous since I was about 19 years old and I am now 32 years old and my sex drive becomes higher and higher every year. Is this normal?

I always hear men complain that their women do not like to have sex and within a group of my friends, there are only two of us that have high sex drives. Can someone clear the air about this subject?

Add a Comment125 Comments

EmpowHER Guest

I'm 17 years old. I have a much higher sex drive than the guy I'm currently seeing. It's really frustrating because he is inexperienced with girls with a high SD and he finds it intimidating. I get sexually frustrated so easily that all it takes is a look. Whether I'm doing the looking or someone else is looking at me. Be it male or female, I'm pretty much undressing people with my eyes all the time.

October 5, 2014 - 4:07pm
EmpowHER Guest

I have a high SD I realized this for 1 most of all my past relationships were valued by quality of sex.2. I noticed a 2 year break up cycle. 3 I have never been single. I have always had an out let so never have had a prob. But now the man i want to be with and omg possibly marrie is 20 years older than me and cnt handle my inner freak. I just want to slow it down a couple 10 notches and dnt know how. As a matter of fact lack of seems to be making it worse. I just want to be calm like i was before. And stop thinking about sex so i can enjoy this man. The otherday he was talking and i was undressing him with my eyes pretending to listen. I felt like... so not a good person.

August 5, 2014 - 9:35pm
EmpowHER Guest

I am 27 yr female married to a great guy 10yrs my senior since 2006. Known my husband since 2005 after graduating high school. I have a very high sex drive. And have had affairs on and off since 2007 when his drive went down. I know it isn't right but I Cannot get enough sex and then I fell in love with a boyfriend (2007-2010) but ultimately stayed with Husband due to kids :-(

Now I met this guy (19yr) and he's amazing both in and out of bed and I want to know what people think. Is it crazy for me to Want out of this marriage where our libido just doesn't work? I also have pondered leaving just to be single and have all the fun I want or I have this friend (my age) who's wife is leaving him because their sexual preferences don't match. She wants a lot of sex but not with him and he wants sex with her more frequently plus some group sex which she told him he is crazy. I think me and him might be an awesome fit sexually but then I don't know if I like him enough to give up a great bf who makes me want to leave my husband. Any suggestions for me on This would be greatly appreciated

June 18, 2014 - 12:13pm
Susan Cody HERWriter Guide (reply to Anonymous)

Hi Anon!

Thanks for your post!

You are not invested in your marriage at all. It's not working and I don't think it's all because of your different sex drives, I think you are searching for something that you are not getting. Will you get it with these men? I don't think so but you are not mentally or emotionally in this marriage so it may best to leave.

It sounds like you have children too but are wishing for the single life. I think you've made some huge mistakes here by having children and I think you would agree that you are bring incredibly selfish.

Have you tried to get into therapy? To really sit down and talk with your husband? To end a family unit because you want the single life (when you have kids) . You're jumping from man to man looking for sexual satisfaction that you are still not really getting.

I think therapy is a great idea, at least to begin with. If things do not work out (and they may not) then at least you will know you tried. It may be better than he has the children and you can have visitation. Kids, as you know, need stability and not a parent who is obsessed with sex with multiple men. That's not a criticism - if that's how you are, then that's how you are. But don't inflict the aftermath of this on your kids. You won't be able to hide this from them, they will know.

Good luck to you and remember to put your kids first - it may be best to allow them to be raised by their Dad.



August 21, 2014 - 5:54am
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Anonymous)

Yeah, you're retarded, without any virtue and playing Russian roulette with your Vag.

August 19, 2014 - 5:56pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Anonymous)

You need to hmu... So we can discuss this...

July 9, 2014 - 5:44pm
EmpowHER Guest

I am 24 years old i recently had a tubal ligation coagulation after having my fourth baby girl. it has been exactly a week and 2 days since my surgery and i am so emotional i can be happy and laughing one second then the next second crying and mad and ready to fight. i am also wanting sex all the time i can be fixing my hair and get excited and wet and want sex. im confused and frustrated because i dont know why this is happening to me i dont take any medicine at all so im not sure what it could be could someone please give me a little advice... thanks

May 22, 2014 - 1:44pm
Susan Cody HERWriter Guide (reply to Anonymous)

Hi Anon

You may be having a hormonal reaction to you tubal ligation or your your body is having an emotional response. It's a good idea to mention this to your doctor and see if something can be done to lessen this drive and ease your frustrations. A tubal is a relief for most women but there are also unexpected emotional responses that women aren't really told about. 



June 13, 2014 - 9:23am
EmpowHER Guest

Is there really such thing as a sexual peak when you hit at a certain age? I have been pretty promiscuous since I was about 19 years old and I am now 32 years old and my sex drive becomes higher and higher every year. Is this normal? It's like i want all the time. I don't want this to take over my life.

February 23, 2014 - 2:21pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Anonymous)

Hi Anonymous, I am and have been in the same boat as you. I even went to an Endocrinologist for help to reduce my sex drive and he thought I was out of my mind and told me to be grateful!! I am 57 yrs old. I am also single and have been for a while. I have been this way my whole life (as young as early 20's) and it has never changed. I am not "dry" like some women. All I have to do is think about a man I like and I get "wet". Or for no reason at all I will just get the "urge". I know you know what I mean. I hope you don't have this issue when you get to be my age. I am just afraid once I find someone again I pray he doesn't have erection issues or his sex drive is much less than mine. Every year I think it will change, but it never does. I hope you are married to a wonderful man who can appreciate your sex drive. Oh and, ya, none of my female friends have any sex drive at all. They think I'm weird. They make me feel like I'm a pervert. But I'm not, I'm a normal woman who just loves sex and loves being with a man- meaning a husband.

June 8, 2014 - 11:04am
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