Something You May Not Know About Breastfeeding: Depression After Weaning
For some women, when breastfeeding stops, the sadness begins. At least that is what happened to me. But it wasn’t just sadness. It was irritability, lack of patience and physical discomfort. I just wasn't feeling like myself.
It was only in talking with other moms that I realized that these symptoms are more common than I knew. There are so many support groups for women to help with breastfeeding. What about those of us that are quitting?
I made the decision to nurse all three of my children, but prior to having kids I was not very comfortable with the idea of breastfeeding. Although I wasn’t sure that it was right for me, I gave it a chance for the nutritional benefits for my children. I have to say, with each baby, it felt more natural but I was always ready for my baby to graduate from breastfeeding. Or so I thought.
Imagine my surprise when after weaning my 3rd son, I found myself missing the very thing that I never thought I would do. We just celebrated his first birthday. Do I really miss nursing him? Am I emotional because he is growing out of his baby stage? Is it because I believe that he is my last baby and I will never breastfeed again? What is this change that is happening to me?
Add A New CommentWe value and respect the experiences of all of our HerWriters, but everyone is different. Many of our writers are speaking from personal experience, and what's worked for them may not work for you. Their articles are not a substitute for medical advice although we hope you can gain knowledge from their insight.
Add A New Comment11 Comments
Hi I'm wondering how long you breastfeed your children for??? I believe there is a strong bond when breastfeeding, a surrendering of yourself for the babies sack, so there is a grieving for the lose of that bond. If that is too uncomfortable I suggest stopping was too early. Was your baby happy for it to end??? Us humans are mammals after all.
My first son was 6 weeks. My second was almost a year and our third (the only one that I seem to be experiencing these symptoms with) was a year. I quit shortly after his first birthday. He is happy. He enjoys drinking whole milk from a straw and doesn't seem to even miss nursing. Weaning was easy for him. Easier, apparently then for me. Maybe you are right and it is the bonding time that I miss. I thought that I was alone in feeling the way that I was feeling. It surprised me to find out how many other women felt the same and that is why I felt it was important to share my story.
Thank you for this thoughtful article as this is a subject that needs to be talked about, and more women need to know that these feelings are a normal part of the emotional roller coaster of motherhood (e.g. I cried in the parking lot on my first child's first day of pre-school). Breastfeeding is an intense and wonderful bonding experience, and it is natural that we need to adjust emotionally when it ends, just like any other transition in life.
Hi, I am wondering how long your depression has carried on. I never wanted to really stop BFing at 20 months.(I supplemented though after 8 months) I still have little drops of milk after 2.5 yrs (my daughter is 4 now). I realize now that I have been quite attached to the milk. Almost every week I would sqeeze to see if those few drops are still there. In the back of my mind I thought as long as its still active, then in an emergency she can go back to nursing after days of sucking. NOW crap....I am having a hard time with losing that bond. I don't know why now. Maybe because I would love another child and it's too late. Maybe because I understand more about Bf now and wished I had gone on longer. I have decided to stimulate the milk production and pump at least one glass per day for her. It's healthy, she will stay weaned and I will fell like I'm doing all I can to nuture.
It lasted about 2 weeks then I felt like I was back to normal again. Have you thought about contacting your doctor or hers to talk about how you are feeling?