Things I Took for Granted Before I Had Kids
Parenthood has bought me joy like I have never felt before but like many new parents, I had NO IDEA was I was getting into. The constant surprises keep me laughing if I am not crying or asking out loud, “WHY? WHY ME?” Here is my top ten list of the things that I took for granted before having kids.
10. RUNNING ERRANDS
Gone are the days where I am able to “run in real quick” to do anything. Not going to Ulta for some make-up that I ran out of. Not returning the impulse buy from Target. Something as simple as buying a gallon of milk or package of diapers, takes planning and real effort. Thank goodness for my husband and his Blackberry. If I realize that I need something from the store, I will send him a note with grocery items to buy. He stops on his way home and I don’t have to load three kids into the car, along with everything they need. This brings me to #9-“Leaving the house.”
9. LEAVING THE HOUSE
Before Kids (which I commonly refer to as BK), leaving the house consisted of checking my make-up and hair, finding matching shoes for my outfit and grabbing my purse. Now, with three kids, I make sure everyone is dressed, brush three sets of teeth, find shoes for the kids (and sometimes socks which don’t always match), pack snacks, drinks, books for the car, and search for the Lego figure of choice that day, complete with all his accessories, of course. Then everything gets loaded in the car. It takes about 10 minutes to get all the kids to stop crawling around inside the car and get strapped into their seats. I run into the house at least two more times for items that I have forgotten. By the time that I get back out to the car, someone has to use the bathroom. Finally after everyone is strapped back in, I sit down and start to move the car as sweat drips down my back. This is all for a trip to the post office to mail a package. If it is your birthday and you get a gift in the mail from me, you are very special.
8. DAILY SHOWERS
I reference my article last week, “Can Showering Improve Your Mood?” As I explain in that article, “When I became a Mom, I didn’t realize that a shower would turn into a luxury instead of a necessity.”
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Furniture - We learned the beauty of faux brushed seude! Our sofas look like gorgeous, rich, soft mocha colored suede but are actually of the faux variety (and bought on sale!) and the seats can be unzipped and popped in the washer. One evening a friend spilled her glass of red wine all over a sofa and I just washed it away with a clean cloth. Love it!
Leaving the house - it still takes ages but we no longer do snacks/drinks for local trips. Long distance only! We decided it was using food to keep them quiet (I admit I still do that for Church at times) and that it wasn't the trouble. They really didn't notice.
Showers - I always take daily showers, by popping all 3 kids in it with me. Now that they are 3, 4 and 5 I usually get to shower - alone. It's a beautiful thing. However, they are often outside the shower door, having in-depth conversations with me. As long as I say "wow, that's great!" or "cool!" on occasion, they're fine and I have no idea what their talking about as the water drowns them out and I can only catch the occasional "and then Spiderman..." or " so I was running..." . I'm on a need to know basis and I don't always need to know.
Privacy in the bathroom - I'm mostly good for this now but do occasionally have a child informing me of important details of their newly built fort, and all up in my face as I take a quick pee. I guess it's literally face-to-face time which is important (!).
Quiet time - ......what?
August 28, 2009 - 1:02pmThis Comment
I had to laugh after reading your article. I remember those days of chaos and mishaps. Rand and Nick are 10 and 11, so some of that stuff has subsided. Hope all is well with you and your family! Tammie
September 1, 2009 - 6:56amI always did enjoy privacy in the bathroom; but, the kids enjoyed whispering outside the door. Who knows what they were plotting.
My showers were always mine alone. But, as soon as I got into a bubble bath, there were little raps at my bedroom door.
I didn't worry about kid stuff on my clothes as much as cat fur. Note to self: black or white are for the brave. Lactation was a problem - always seemed to hit in the middle of grocery shopping.
We had table rules. No one started eating until everyone was seated. No one leaves without being excused, either.
We also had a rule about furniture, not that it was always followed. Now that my kids have their own places, maybe I can finally replace the furniture that has managed to outlast their early years. More pieces were destroyed by cats than kids.
I was a supremely organized multi-tasker and thoroughly enjoyed delegating tasks to whomever is standing around with nothing else to do...hehe
Shopping with toddlers was an adventure. While the boys were quite cooperative and well-behaved, my daughter, the youngest, would be more than a handful. She still is!
I did have "quiet time," about the time I fell asleep...usually just before the time I had to wake up. lol!
September 1, 2009 - 5:15pmSome of us figured these out early on, and stopped after having the first one. I mean honestly, did you think it would get easier with more kids?
September 3, 2009 - 6:08amNo, I didn't think it would get easier but sometimes the best things in life are not easy. I am glad that you knew that one child was all that you wanted.
September 3, 2009 - 1:06pmIt would be nice if everyone had the choice to have only one. As for me I had twin girls on the first try. After that I figured it couldn't get much harder and five years later had my third child (another girl). As crazy as it get around my house with 11 year old identical twins and a 5 year old, I wouldn't change it for the world.
September 24, 2009 - 7:18amGood for you for having three kids. I'm pregnant with my 4th and the woman with only one kid saying some snarky remark about "some people learn this early on, that's why I stopped at one..." is a bitch and I'm sure her single child is lonely, or will be asking for a brother or sister by the time he's 6 years old. By that time, she'll be in menopause and it will be too late. That's where selfishness gets you.
January 25, 2010 - 2:07pmThat's assuming they're that late on in their life. I doubt she'll be in menopause.
And many single children end up being very happy that they were only child's.
Sure, her comment was rude, but since when is having one kid selfish?
Don't assume.
April 11, 2010 - 12:22pmGreat article! I have three boys myself- 5, 3, 15 mos. I could have written this myself!!
September 5, 2009 - 9:30ambut you didnt because you have kids. Instead, you blog'd.
September 7, 2009 - 11:05am