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Advice wanted

By Anonymous December 27, 2015 - 2:22pm
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Yesterday i was very irresponsible. I was under the influence of multiple things such as alcohol and marijuana and a guy that was at the party, kept harassing me. I remember telling him more than once that i didn't want to have sex, but he touched and caressed me. I started jacking him off and told me to go to the bathroom so no one could see what i was doing somehow he slipped on a condom. I gave him oral and then we ended up having sex. I made him stop and he was like if i was uncomfortable we could stop so i told him too. He told me that he hope i don't look at him differently after this. I was so confused and everything was/is a blur to me. I honestly didn't know what i want it just seemed to happened. I went out the room and told my friends what happened they said it was my fault and that it was no way i could have still been intoxicated, but this is very out of character for me to do. I had been knowing him since high school and through a mutual friend. I felt so dirty. I went home took a shower and douche with water and vingear thinking it would make me feel better and cleaner. One of my friends said that it was a form of rape but idk because i still participated in the act. I have been crying all day. Was i raped and not know it? or just taken advantage of?

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Hello Anonymous,

Welcome to EmpowHER. Thank you for reaching out to our community for advice. We are here to offer support and guidance. Every one who comments on your post may have a different opinion.

I can appreciate how you must be feeling right now. It is important that you look at this incident from a clear perspective. Seeking the help of a therapist or counselor may be necessary in the future.

Personally, I do not think this was rape. The key is "he was like if i was uncomfortable we could stop so i told him too."

You were an active participant.


December 28, 2015 - 9:57am
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