Why Doesn't my boyfriend want to have sex with me anymore?

Thank you for your insight anonymous. I certainly agree that communication is very important in a relationship. If you cannot communicate well with your significant other, there will be issues in the future. I find that relationships based on sex, do not work but relationships based on communication and understanding will last a lifetime.

Hope this helps.

I know it is hard but keep your head in the game so to speak. Me and my boyfriend of 3 years went threw the same thing. When we started dating it was a long distance relationship and when we were together it was 2-3 times a day. Then when we moved in together it was at least everynight, then we had a talk about it and it was too much for him, with work and kids much to my relief it wasn't me as I am sure it isn't you either men are odd and won't talk unless spoken to when it comes to these thing. So we talked about it and decided on every other day which isn't bad and sometimes it may go a week until we do it. I guess what I am trying to say is, things change people change and we change the thing to do in the relationship world is to change with them. Talk it out, communication is huge and trust is even more important. If he doesn't want to talk don't push it, and let him think it is on his terms, but get everything you want to say out when you are both ready. Good luck, and remember what started your spark and keep the flame going

I WENT THRU THE SAME THING, SO DONT WORRY U R NOT ALONE.. I ACTUALLY TALKED TO SOMEONE WHO HE TALKED TO ABOUT THE SITUATION AND HE TOLD THEM THAT HE JUST DID NOT HAVE THE SEX DRIVE HE USED TO AND HE LOVED ME TO DEATH AND IT WASNT ME HE JUST WASNT INTO IT ANYMORE, EVERY SITUATION IS DIFFERENT SO I DONT KNOW IF THIS WILL HELP BUT IT'S MY EXPERIENCE, WE ARE NOT TOGETHER ANYMORE BUT MY ADVICE IS JUST TRY TO BOOST YOUR SEX LIVES, MAYBE YOU SHOULD TRY SOMETHING REALLY NEW AND TALK TO HIM, I TRIED TO TALK TO MY BOYFRIEND AND HE ACTED LIKE I WANT IS SEX, WHICH WAS NOT THE CASE, THE BOTTOM LINE IS THAT WE ALL NEDD TO HAVE OUR NEEDS MET AND IF YOU WANT TO KEEP YOUR RELATIONSHIP STRONG YOU NEED TO DO SOMETHING NOW, HOPE THIS WILL HELP..

Hi,
Everyone writing on here...there is nothing wrong with the guy or with you!
What is wrong is the lack of education about how to enjoy sex, or how to make it enjoyable, how to make time for it. How to train your brain to make it a routine of life. Yes routine here is used in a good way. Not to mean monotonous, but as regular as brushing your hair or your teeth.
Yes, lust is there in the beginning so it is "effortless" with anybody and everybody. Right? Right?
Isn't that the recurrent theme on this posts? Yes. So, after the honeymoon phase is over, which will eventually come sooner than later for others...the question is, how to sustain it. Here is where education takes a role. And it needs the effort of both parties. One cannot do it alone. It will be like climbing Mount Everest if one tries to do so. It will be futile. But then again, it only takes one person to start and encourage the other party to follow suit. It also takes a lot of communication and honesty. I know a lot of women here feel they are hitting a brick wall, and coming up against a dead end situation. I know. I'm one of those women. But I don't give up. For as long as I want to stay with my guy, I am not going to sit back and be complacent and get bitter. I'm going to the bottom and root of why my guy do not have the desire to have sex anymore. Personally for me, I've had a few conversations with him and each time we are delving deeper. I find if I am not defensive, and really hear what he is saying to me, and I'm not thinking about my agenda is when he opens up and in the end, I get my answers. Isn't that what we want? To understand so we can do something about it? The reasons are numerous and can be different and unique with each relationship, or they can be similar. Compatibility, sexual preference, different point of views, your "sexiness" factor (which he will not tell you outright because he doesn't want to hurt you), a lot plays a factor. The talk is not easy and it will not fix everything overnight, and you may not get what you want...there is no guarantee. There are no guarantees in life. But it gives you a peace of mind, and the feeling that all is well again, if you don't just sit there and do nothing and feel miserable. Please. Do something good for yourself, something courageous and face that fear. Talk to your guy and really. I mean, really listen and be open.

to all the women who had a great sex life with your boyfriends in the beginning. my personal experience with my boyfriend was men get bored very easily. the biggest thing for men is once they have you it is not a challenge for them anymore. the saying goes (IT'S NOT THE KILL IT'S THE THRILL OF THE CHASE). We as women we make it to easy for our men. sorry to say that. I am in the same situation I am a very sexual person and according to my boyfriend so is he. well not with me is is not. the weird thing is he does not stay late he comes straight home after work. he loves to hold my hand. but that is as far as it gets. I bring it to his attention about why we are not having sex. then he would make the effort to have sex. I hate that about him. sex is very important it is healthy for the body.

thanks,

angie

I have exactly the same problem! I am a year younger than my partner and he never wants it anymore!! We used to have it roughly every 3 days and now I am lucky if I get it once a week or a week and a half. I dont know what to do. Any suggestions??

I am in the same rut just like you. I have been dating my boyfriend for about 3 years now. our sex life used to be great we used to do it daily. with in the last year it went down hill. I bring it to his attention then we have sex. I hate that because he only does it when I point it out to him. I think he feels guilty. he is 3 years older than me. what I suggest for you to do is to get another boyfriend and don't let him find out. I am sorry I am giving this advice but why should we suffer just becuase the thrill is gone for them. My boyfriend tells me he loves me and he can not see him self with me.

THANKS FOR ALL THE OPOINONS. WE HAVE SEX MORE THAN ONCE A WEEK. SOMETIMES IT LAST A FEW SECONDS AND I FEEL LIKE A DUMPING STATION. HE STILL WONT TELL ME HE LOVES ME. IT HAS BEEN OVER S YEAR WE HAVE BEEN TOETHER. HE USED TO SAY 'i love you'. I FEEL LIKE HE DOES LOVE ME.
IT IS A CONFUSING RELATIONSHIP, I AM NOT READY TO GIVE HIM UP. I THINK I STILL LOVR HIM. ONE THING I LIKE ABOUT IS HE IS VERY PASSIONSTE., HE HAS A BOY LIKE INNOCENT STYLE SOMETIMES AND A VERY SEXY VOICE. THESE ARE SOME DEEP QUALITIES. DON;T YOU THINK?

I want ask you , but I don't want you to be angry I wanna ask you if he could has any other relationships.