Dr. Irwin Goldstein, explains what he says to woman who are too private to seek help to improve their sexual health. Dr. Goldstein has authored more than 325 publications in the field of sexual dysfunction, with 20 consecutive years of funding by the National Institutes of Health in this area. He is Editor-in Chief of The Journal of Sexual Medicine, the official journal of the International Society for Sexual Medicine.
For some woman who is embarrassed or humiliated or not ready to have a full discussion, I would say if the medical problem is of concern, if there is going to be a relationship change or if you don’t feel whole because you once thought of yourself sexually and if you don’t have that experience anymore, I would get over the embarrassment.
I would say, "Would you be embarrassed if your leg was fractured? Would you be embarrassed if you had chest pain? Would you be embarrassed if you have hypertension or high cholesterol?" Probably not. Well, you have a medical problem. What I tell men and women in particular is that if they are having good sexual function, that generally means they are in good overall health. If they have a sexual problem or sexual dysfunction I would suggest to them, that means there’s something wrong, and they should get that evaluated and find out what’s wrong and deal with it.
The initial impression in most people, because of what they have heard is that all of this is in the head, and I would say that a lot of this is in the head, but a lot of this is biologic too. A lot of what’s in the head doesn’t necessarily have to be primary; it can be secondary to the biologic problem. Anxiety and fear and depression and embarrassment can be due to a lack of a hormone. If you don’t have self-confidence and self-esteem, that could be related to a nerve injury or that could be related to a post-operative thing, or that can be related to medication. So I would suggest that people get the proper evaluation, find out what’s wrong, and treat it as they would any other medical problem.
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