Sue W. Goldstein, author of "When Sex Isn't Good", explains her secrets to better sex health. Sue Goldstein is Program Coordinator at San Diego Sexual Medicine at Alvarado Hospital.
All women deserve satisfying sexual life. When we are in our 20s we are too afraid to tell our partner, "Touch me here, do this, do that." When we're in our 30s we are starting our careers, our children are young, and there is no time to think about sex. When we're in our 40s the kids are teenagers. They never go to sleep when you are supposed to have sex, or you are doing very well with your business and you are traveling all the time. Now you are in your 50s, the kids are gone, the job is stable, now it is time; you are comfortable, maybe you have been with your partner a long time, maybe it is a new partner, but you are self-assured in your own life. Now you know what you want and your body does not work, and it is just not fair.
Let me just tell you a little bit about my personal experience. I thought my husband was having issues when I found out it was actually my sexual health. Part of the reason why I wanted to write a book for other women was because I knew if I did not have any clue that it was my sexual health that was becoming dysfunctional, if I did not know and I am not a healthcare provider but I am very involved in the field, how could other women know, and I wanted to share that experience. My story is in the book that I wrote; just to show you again, it is When Sex Isn’t Good. It is a collection of stories of women with sexual health problems, and that is the first half. The second half is actually medical information written in a way that lay public could understand it, all evidence-based medicine.
I knew that if I did not know the problem was mine, other women were not going to know that. When I was on medication, and all medication is evidence-based, it is actually hormones, and my blood levels are tested routinely to make sure that I am within normal levels, my sexual life returned and I realized what I was missing. As I went through menopause, again I became dysfunctional and this time I was angry because I knew what I was missing. I knew that sex just was not good. It is important to have good sex, and it is satisfying to have good sex, and it is fun to have good sex.
So, my immediate demand was, "Make me better," and they tested my blood again and changed my hormones so that my hormone levels were normal, and I think that is a really important message for women not to be afraid of hormones because of what you read in the paper. A lot of that is about hormones that were based on horse urine, and they were given to women without having their blood levels drawn on a regular basis.
If you keep your hormone levels at what is normal you do not grow a beard. You do not see a beard on me. I am a first soprano, I have been on testosterone for five years; I am still a first soprano. If you keep everything within normal level, you are keeping your body within normal level and when you add those hormones you not only do have a better sex life, but you have more energy, you have more muscle strength, you have an evenness of mood, even my kids could not make me crazy or not too crazy. There is just so much more to life, and that is one of the reasons why we tried to have all the women who come to San Diego Sexual Medicine, their hormone levels tested and return them to normal. Because it is not just your sex life, it is your overall health. So, people should not be afraid to ask about sexual health because it is really your overall health we are talking about.
See Sue Goldstein's Book:
Visit Sue Goldstein's Website: