(The below is a guest blog written by 4Women Research and Communications Director, Michelle Young. I thought I'd share her unique viewpoint.)
I admit it. Being called “fashionable” does not strike me as a compliment. Bizarre woman I am in this culture, I know.
Since age 15, when I realized I was tired of the superficial teenage relationships that were supposed to pass for friendship, I’ve rejected “fashionable,” realizing it was my Jordache jeans, not my personality, that brought me popularity with the “popular” girls (and sought-after boys). I wanted to be able to see through the social acts, see my peers for who they truly were rather than who they were trying to be. And since I wasn’t interested in bonding over sports, French club or the Bible either, I was left with no social images to mirror (or friends). What a relief! Imagine that, a teenager forced to think for herself. I am forever grateful.
Rather than look to my mom’s stack of Cosmopolitan, to the popular girls at school, or to the media for instructions on how to dress, I looked inward. It was a beginning, a new path.
Fast forward X number of years (I know, the Jordache jeans give it away). Much about my present-day “style” (or lack thereof) and the way I carry myself comes from others, just not the profit-maximizing, brain-washing varieties. Having been deeply priveleged to live in Africa, Latin America and the Caribbean, I’ve assimilated what appeals to me from each culture, be it in fashion or food recipes and yes, at core.
So sorry Vogue, I could not care less what colors or styles are parading the runways during New York Fashion Week. They’re there to profit from me (and you) by convincing us to exchange our old wardrobe for new at 3-month intervals so that their profits never cease. Sorry for the blatant honesty, but while fashion advice is prolific, blatant honesty is rare.
No, I’d rather emulate a woman in Ghana, who despite having to parade the streets of Accra with a 50-lb tray of mangoes balanced on her head, beams colors, patterns, elegance, and self-respect. I want to emulate Rastafarian women, who do not dress to showcase their bodies, preferring not to be reduced to slabs of sexual meat or eye candy by the eyes of both male and female onlookers. I want to emulate the women of India, who adorn themselves in colors, patterns, creativity, without appearing desperate for attention. I want to emulate the women of Ambavatany, Madagascar, who despite living on the very edge of survival, adorn themselves in silver bangles defiantly reconfigured from the melted remains of colonial French francs.
And yet I am apparently fashionable, or so I am often told. I’m always stunned by the compliments (?) because if my knee length organic hemp jackets (see marigoldfairtradeclothing.com for your own), my long colorful skirts, my very roomy and always wide legged, vaginal health preserving pants are so appealing to on-lookers, why aren’t my complimenteers dressing likewise?
Maybe it’s because real fashion isn’t about mimicking the runway models or following the princesses of pop culture, or me for that matter. Maybe using clothes to demonstrate your depth, your personality, your experience, while preserving self-respect, creativity, and an independent mind are high-fashion ideas. Maybe most women would rather be told what to wear, would rather have to renew their wardrobes at 3-month intervals, would rather not think for themselves or simply do not trust themselves to do so and come out the other end looking “acceptable”. And therein lies the point.
If it’s about pleasing others, it’s simply copycat fashion. Who are You without the clothes?
Step 1 - Peel off one-by-one those layers of seasonally socially indoctrinated fashion. Step 2 - Now get to know yourself minus your socially constructed identity, the real you. See and feel how precious and divine you are, not because you look good, but simply because you are part of this miraculous sphere of Life. Step 3 - Now get dressed.
Now, I LOVE your style.
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Hi Susan,
I appreciate and I know Michelle appreciates your perspective. I forwarded her your comment and suggested she write her own response. Here's what she forwarded to me:
This piece is entirely about me and my personal reaction to being called "fashionable". It's not about anyone else, so I regret if anyone takes it personally. You'll notice that the only time I talk about anyone's experience other than my own is when I wonder why it is that the same woman who repeatedly praises my wardrobe choices (my beloved employer, Susan) might not choose a similar wardrobe, or their own, rather than following trends set by profiteers. Susan and I have this conversation often, and she has never taken my perspectives personally.
I do not understand what's "close-minded" about expressing the experiences that compel me to dress as I do. If someone else wrote an essay about what makes them love wearing comfy sweats and baseball caps, how their experience growing up in a family of athletes or any other experience inspired their sense or lack of sense of fashion, I wouldn't find it "close-minded" as that person would simply be sharing their preferences, contextualized by their experiences.
I never referred to myself as "unique". Certainly, in certain communities where I have resided, the wardrobe items I describe are the norm, not the exception. If fair trade textiles that do not contribute to the destruction and poisoning of the Earth, rather than over-priced items produced by underpaid workers were the norm, the world would be a more just place. I don't know where you live, but I am not the only parent who perceives my son's primary school as a Vogue style fashion show. Unisex jeans and no make up are not the norm among women here. Again, you speak from the temple of your spiritual being, your place on Earth, your experiences, and I get to speak from mine.
In my role at 4Women, I have nothing to do with the fashion design or creativity aspects of the business. Susan often laughs at how unaware I have remained. I once took a call from Vera Wang's office for Susan and could not get the name right, leaving Ms. Wang's assistant in apparent bewilderment, I having never heard of her. This aspect of my personality amuses Susan. At the same time, she is always commenting that despite having no awareness of mainstream fashion, I am so "fashionable". She has often followed up such statements with requests for me to write about what inspires my own fashion sense. I resisted for a long time, maybe sensing that I could not be blatantly honest without someone taking it personally. I regret that's how you received my piece.
I assure you, I do not care what you or any other woman is wearing. Fashion - be it mine, your's, her's, simply doesn't make it on the list of what matters to me. We are destroying the planet, so quickly that I have to wonder what will be left for my 5 yr old son, and so frankly, worrying what anyone is wearing would seem a dangerous distraction from what really matters. No planet - no life - no fashion - no fashion blogs. -Michelle
Again, Michelle's words above - not mine (Susan Beausang's). She's right. I do welcome a diversity of perspectives in my life. And Michelle is anything but disrespectful of others.
Thanks for writing, Susan.
January 20, 2011 - 8:25amThis Comment