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ask: Is 45 too old to have a baby??

By Anonymous
 
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I'm recently married and my new husband and I have started talking about having a baby together. Not right away, but maybe we'd start trying in the next year or two. I have a couple of teenagers from my previous marriage and this is his first marriage (no kids). The problem is timing - we're not getting any younger!! We're both in our 40's - I'll be turning 45 later this year, and when I had my last baby at age 31, I thought I was totally done having kids. I never would have dreamed I'd even be thinking about another baby, but of course I never ever dreamed I'd get divorced and then remarried.

My question to other moms out there is what your opinion is on having a baby later in life. I'd love to know ALL your feelings on this. At the moment, I'm so enjoying my teenagers and love the fact that they're each becoming so independent and that we can do so many fun things together. I love my independence as well, and how much easier this part of my life is. As much as I'd love to have a baby with my husband at some point, I'm wondering if adding a new baby into the mix would be completely insane at this "middle-aged" stage of the game. What do you think? I could sure use some advice!

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Anonymous

I'll be turning 45 in a week, I am currently 30 weeks pregnant, and got pregnant naturally, my EDD is June 5th 2015! I learned that as long as you are healthy and still having healthy periods, concieving naturally is possible! I am excited to meet my 3rd son who we're naming Jacob. I have 2 sons from a previous marriage, they are grown men now in their mid 20s! I feel truly blessed to be expecting again.

March 27, 2015 - 12:34pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

I'll be turning 45 in a week, I am currently 30 weeks pregnant, and got pregnant naturally, my EDD is June 5th 2015! I learned that as long as you are healthy and still having healthy periods, concieving naturally is possible! I am excited to meet my 3rd son who we're naming Jacob. I have 2 sons from a previous marriage, they are grown men now in their mid 20s! I feel truly blessed to be expecting again.

March 27, 2015 - 12:34pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

I really appreciate all of your stories. I will be 45 in 3 months . My husband and have a 5yr old son. In the last 3 yrs we had 2 miscarriages. so I had pretty much given up on having a baby on my own. However the desire to have another baby never went away. But after reading yr stories I feel inspired that it is possible . Thank you ladies for giving me hope again . Whether I get pregnant or not its OK. As long as I continue t
try.

March 23, 2015 - 2:54pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

Am little bit worry but i have trust in God that anything its impossible to God am getting marry this year my hsb is 40yrs and 44yrs we both have children on our ex partness he wanted to have child on mi so badlly i have 4 beatiful chldrn 3 boys and 1 grl.I believe that i can make it.I found very interested about this story that a read here .

March 12, 2015 - 2:28am
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

I am 45 and just found out I am pregnant! I am very excited but also scared. I have two sons 13 and 6 and I thought I was done having kids! It can happen ladies! Stay positive and healthy! Blessings do come and this is a great time for my family. I am only 11 weeks but so far so good!

March 10, 2015 - 12:43am
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Anonymous)

How are you feeling physically? Can your body handle having a baby? Because, I am also 45 and I now have to have reading glasses, I have allergies..What do you think?

March 14, 2015 - 10:35am
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

I met my partner just before I turned 44 & miraculously found out I was pregnant 8 weeks later.
I have had endrometriosis which was removed at age 33 and never reoccurred, but I was convinced I was unable to conceive let alone carry full term after 2 previous miscarriages. I was also scared to be honest, as I have never had a full term pregnancy.
I terminated due all of the above and my partner already had two children he is responsible for - and since we did not really know each other, I thought it best. I had a IUD Merina inserted as contraception so I would not need to go through the tough decisions again.
Now almost a year later, I desperately want a baby.
My partner and I are still together and I am thinking about removing my Merina to try again.
I am scared - am I making a selfish mistake?

February 24, 2015 - 12:22pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Anonymous)

Sorry that you are receiving some harsh judgement from others on this site. It is a very difficult decision to terminate a pregnancy, no doubt you did not take it lightly. There seems to be one pattern in your comments that I find troubling (for your sake). You were scared when you conceived, and you are now scared again. Having a child is an act of faith, courage and love. You get what you get. You may have a wonderful, healthy, loving child. Or you may get a child that is not fully healthy or not very happy, etc. Whatever you do, understand that you cannot have a child for "selfish" reasons. Having a child is all about giving. Giving your love, your attention, your time, your money, your energy. It is extremely demanding on a relationship and on your body. You need to move on from being scared and say "Am I ready to be a grown up and give, give, give?" If you can do that, then talk to your partner to make sure you have support in your relationship. Best of luck to you!

March 23, 2015 - 6:48am
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Anonymous)

So you killed your baby and now you want another one? Yes, you are selfish. You "desperately want a baby" but thought "it best" to kill a baby that you already had. Gee did you consider that baby might have "desperately" wanted a life? You are so gross. Please don't reproduce. A person who could think "it best" to kill a baby is in no way a candidate to be a mother.

March 3, 2015 - 2:11pm
Susan Cody HERWriter Guide (reply to Anonymous)

Hi Anon

Nobody can say you are selfish, that is not anyone's place.   Do what is right for you and your partner, with a future baby's best interests at the forefront. Good luck! 

Susan

February 24, 2015 - 4:40pm
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