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ask: Is 45 too old to have a baby??

By Anonymous
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I'm recently married and my new husband and I have started talking about having a baby together. Not right away, but maybe we'd start trying in the next year or two. I have a couple of teenagers from my previous marriage and this is his first marriage (no kids). The problem is timing - we're not getting any younger!! We're both in our 40's - I'll be turning 45 later this year, and when I had my last baby at age 31, I thought I was totally done having kids. I never would have dreamed I'd even be thinking about another baby, but of course I never ever dreamed I'd get divorced and then remarried.

My question to other moms out there is what your opinion is on having a baby later in life. I'd love to know ALL your feelings on this. At the moment, I'm so enjoying my teenagers and love the fact that they're each becoming so independent and that we can do so many fun things together. I love my independence as well, and how much easier this part of my life is. As much as I'd love to have a baby with my husband at some point, I'm wondering if adding a new baby into the mix would be completely insane at this "middle-aged" stage of the game. What do you think? I could sure use some advice!

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EmpowHER Guest

i had 2 kids at my 39 and 42s....... Im happy Physically and mentally... You can ...... Enjoy

January 19, 2015 - 3:24am
EmpowHER Guest

I had my 6th child at age 45, he is 2 now and perfectly normal. It was not an easy pregnancy. My next child up was 10 at the time so it had been a while. What I can say is that I don't have the energy that I did in my 20ies and 30ies, it's hard having a toddler running around! He is so worth it though. There are risks to everything in life. Woman miscarry in their 20 ies. I don't regret having him so late.

January 14, 2015 - 2:52pm
EmpowHER Guest

I just had a healthy baby girl at 44. It was my 5th child and probably my easiest pregnancy!! I say go for it!!

January 9, 2015 - 11:53am

I have to tell you I was sitting in my living room tonight literally in tears. Long story short, I finally had a long over due myomectomy in 2012 when I was 42 yrs old but did not meet with a fertility specialist until earlier this year to start the long process of IVF. But we had to stop in the middle of our fertility treatment because the accountant changed the price without notice or better yet they charged our health insurance which covered some aspects of our treatment and still wanted us to pay the price of IVF as if we were not insured. Sooo illegal but another topic for another day. When we brought this to their attention they denied billing our insurance even though we had billing statements??? Can you say undue stress? I was 44 then and my AMH was .66. And now, were stuck with a ton of expensive fertility medications we'll never use. I should be in tears over that but here's why I am in tears. I just turned 45 this month I have moved on to yet another fertility specialist who offers Mini IVF which - from my understanding - is better for women my age. Feeling a little worried about my ability to produce my own eggs I asked for another AMH and its came back at .12!!! :'( I'm feeling really down because the doctor said he would like to see at least a .3. I guess I am having a little trouble with how quickly it dropped from a .66 in Jan. to .12 in Dec. BUT I am feeling inspired again after reading many of your post. (Thank you!) On the upside (somewhat), I have an appointment on either New Year's Eve or New Year's Day to do a baseline and praying for some hopeful news. Thanks again everyone for the encouragement.

December 29, 2014 - 7:15pm
EmpowHER Guest

I say go for it. Your older now and you finally found the love of your life who you want to have children with. It may take time so I advise to start trying now if you guys are in agreement.
I pray for you good health, health baby, and healthy marriage and relationship with older children. May you all be blessed.

December 26, 2014 - 9:49am
EmpowHER Guest

Wow all of your stories are so encouraging. Thank you to the first young lady who started the session.
I just turned 45 this month. I finally met back with the love of my life after over 20 years. I was married for twenty years had three children, 21, 19, and 10. I never thought after my divorce, that I would ever consider having children again nor getting married. But God had his on plans. We had been trying since I was 43 to see about having a baby. My love has no children and he is now 45. We finally found a doctor to check everything for us. I had my fibroids removed and my tubed reversed. I have one ovary because I had to have one removed years prior. The doctor has now stated that my tube is blocked because of the scare tissue. Currently I'm praying. I recall years ago when I was pregnant with my other children, I was younger and always had fibroids and still had them. So mericuls can happen.
I thank you all so much. This gives me hope. I really pray for a healthy, beautiful, blessing for us.

December 26, 2014 - 9:16am
EmpowHER Guest

Wow! Reading all the comments really encourages me to keep trying for our dream baby. I'm 41 and been married 2 years to the most incredible man I've ever known. He has 2 young boys from a previous marriage and I have 5 from my first marriage (husband passed away). All my kids are grown and I would LOVE to have one with my hubby! I've had 4 miscarriages in the last year :'( Dr says all tests are fine and miscarriages are due to chromosomal abnormalities. I'm going for IVF as soon as I get my next period.

November 26, 2014 - 1:13pm
EmpowHER Guest

I am 42 years old, my husband just turned 50 in November. I didn't meet him until he was 48 and I was 40. We just got married in July, 2014. He was a cancer patient when he was 28 years old, and after chemo treatment was told his sperm were dead and he couldn't father any children. He went on with his life thinking this was true. Now I'm a getting ready to have his first baby in a couple of weeks. I've never been happier than I am having a baby with the love of my life, and also giving him this precious gift. Don't let society scare you. You can absolutely have a healthy baby. The statistics of babies with defects due to older moms are much lower than having healthy ones. Stay positive and good luck to you and your husband.

November 25, 2014 - 3:25pm
EmpowHER Guest

Hi, to give you some hope I gave birth to my healthy and perfect beautiful daughter at age 45 in August this year and have never been happier. I have a 24 year old son who has grown up and left home leading his own life. Like you I met Mr right late in life and finally have everything I always wanted.
I used serrapeptase to ensure clear ovaries ( 2 a day taken on empty stomach available on amazon) royal jelly and co enzyme q 10 plus healthy eating and walking to try and make sure of a good quality egg. To stimulate ovaries I used natural progesterone cream (also available on amazon and side effect free unlike that used in IVF) as demonstrated by the trialed doctor Lee method, which you can google. Apply a quarter teaspoon to skin twice a day days 5 to 26 of cycle for 2/3 months then stop, it worked for us that first month we stopped. I tracked ovulation with sticks and went for it! Good luck, mums in 40s make great parents, we on average live longer now, I have no probs with tiredness etc compared to being a parent before at 21 and it is just so much more relaxed and enjoyable and you will have so much to offer.

November 19, 2014 - 1:11am
EmpowHER Guest

no problem, just go ahead with your plan. having a new baby will be a happiness for you and just try.

November 17, 2014 - 3:01am
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