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ask: Is 45 too old to have a baby??

By Anonymous
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I'm recently married and my new husband and I have started talking about having a baby together. Not right away, but maybe we'd start trying in the next year or two. I have a couple of teenagers from my previous marriage and this is his first marriage (no kids). The problem is timing - we're not getting any younger!! We're both in our 40's - I'll be turning 45 later this year, and when I had my last baby at age 31, I thought I was totally done having kids. I never would have dreamed I'd even be thinking about another baby, but of course I never ever dreamed I'd get divorced and then remarried.

My question to other moms out there is what your opinion is on having a baby later in life. I'd love to know ALL your feelings on this. At the moment, I'm so enjoying my teenagers and love the fact that they're each becoming so independent and that we can do so many fun things together. I love my independence as well, and how much easier this part of my life is. As much as I'd love to have a baby with my husband at some point, I'm wondering if adding a new baby into the mix would be completely insane at this "middle-aged" stage of the game. What do you think? I could sure use some advice!

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EmpowHER Guest

I gave birth at 48 to a daughter, unexpectedly, after having two sons. My daughter is now 5 years old, my sons are 27 and 30 years old. The best thing about being an older parent is you understand life is a journey. Don't take things personally and so seriously. My daughter has given me energy and drive to make the future of our children better than we ever imagined. Life is an adventure. It's what you make of it, and, what you believe.....can happen.

September 26, 2014 - 10:57pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Anonymous)


October 24, 2014 - 11:54am
sepps (reply to Anonymous)

Your message inspired me
Thank youyv

September 28, 2014 - 4:37pm
EmpowHER Guest

I started to have a baby at age 48. Now I am a 54 years and have a 5 years old boy . I adored him every day. He gave me hope, love and made me look younger , prettier, stronger , and healthier .
I do not regret day.

July 31, 2014 - 6:07am
EmpowHER Guest

I am 41 and am engaged for the first time. My fiance and I will likely get married when I am 42 and will likely try for a child. Neither of us have them. I am nervous because I like my sleep (sleep a solid 8 hours a night) and know I wont get much of it with a newborn (unless we get lucky with a good sleeper). However, I figure that if it is meant to be it will be. If not then we will either adopt or remain childless. I always saw myself being a mother so I want to at least try. However, I wont go through IVF (I'm too old and it is too expensive) so if we can't conceive naturally then we will have to look at other options. I'm happy to read of older mothers who are positive about the decision to become a mother later in life. I hear some older mothers say they were too old and it saddens me. Good luck ladies!

July 3, 2014 - 8:59am
EmpowHER Guest

I have always wanted children but my first marriage was abusive & resulted in no children (perhaps for the best anyway). When I remarried just before my 40s, my new husband was supportive (even though he has 2 adult children) & had a reversal. Years went by with every treatment under the sun. Nine years later & 48 years old, my dream to be a mother came true. Our baby makes me more home bound & friends have dwindled but hearing the sweet chattering, coos & squeals of delight makes these life changes so worth it. Our baby is keeping both of us young :)

July 2, 2014 - 8:39pm
Sharban (reply to Anonymous)

Hello anonymous. I am in a similar position that you were in. My new husband has children from a previous relationship and I do not. We have talked about having a child together but he's had a vasectomy and I am 45 years old! I am so undecided for a number of reasons. 1. My age associated with fertility 2. The success rate of his vasectomy reversal and 3. The complications that could arise because of my age (defects or abnormalities in the baby). It's just such a worry. I guess I'm just looking for a little reassurance.....

August 24, 2014 - 1:13am
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Sharban)

I am 42, husband is 44 he has a child from previous marriage I thought I couldn't have children but fell pregnant this year but lost it. Now I know I can I desperately want one, but my husband thinks he is now too old, and his child is 13 feels his sleepless night days are over. I just want him to say let's have a baby!

September 15, 2014 - 2:48am
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Anonymous)

Thats such a lovely story that gives me hope!!! Even better that its recent.

July 28, 2014 - 11:09am
EmpowHER Guest

Hi all I had my daughter at 42 thoroughly enjoyed being a mum again think I had more patience and was more laid back than with my other children x i say go for it best of luck xx

June 3, 2014 - 4:03pm
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