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Anyone using the Mirena IUD have a low sex drive? Mine is almost non existant! :o(

By April 24, 2009 - 1:10pm
 
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EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

I'm crying right now, I'm so relieved to know I'm not alone and so sorry that there are so many of us suffering like this.

I've had the Mirena since late December 2014 when I was 41 and in a new relationship. I chose it for the passive birth control as well as period management; my flow was always ridiculously heavy (I needed super absorbent tampons and had to back them up with overnight pads, both of which needed to be changed every two hours) and I couldn't take being chained to the bathroom for a week every month.

Since then, I've put on about 15 lbs, started getting more pimples than I used to, I'm exhausted all the time, i have frequent headaches, and because I already suffer from depression, it's become worse and worse. It never occurred to me that the Mirena might have been the cause of all that, including my lack of sexual desire, so for most of our relationship, my boyfriend (who is now my husband) thought I didn't desire him. Everything either makes me cry or angry. I've started thinking a lot about suicide and death over the last few months.

My husband is about to leave me because he thinks I've never wanted him sexually, that I must be seeing someone on the side, and because I've become more and more moody and ragey, picking fights over every damned thing, he thinks I don't even want to be with him, let alone have sex. He's so angry with me.

I'm crying now because even if I get the Mirena removed, what if the effects don't go away in time for me to save my marriage? I'm so scared that I'm going to lose the man I love, that if it turns out the mirena is the reason for all my crazy, he'll think I'm making it all up to keep him from leaving.

April 23, 2017 - 8:17am
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

THANK YOU EVERYONE WHO POSTED HERE! I'm 22 y/o when no sex drive. I've had the mirEna for right at 5 years and this has been affecting my marriage for 2. Once were having sex, it's amazing, toe curling, lip biting amazing! I always have an orgasm. I HAVE ONE SEXY HUSBAND! I just can't get it started, I can't initiate it, it's pushing him away thinking I'm not attracted to him or I'm getting it for elsewhere which neither are the case! I'm making an appointment tomorrow to get this taken out! I can't have this ruin my marriage lIke it has been! Anyone, if you have doubts...don't question it for as long as I have...as soon as the thought crosses you mind it could be the Mirena, TAKE IT OUT!!

April 20, 2017 - 3:44pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

I hope a man's exoerience could be helpful to some.

My wife had hers implanted shortly after my daughter was born. I offered to have a vasectomy, but she wanted me to retain the choice for a few more years in case I decided I wanted another child. This was my first, her third. That was five years ago, and we're both around 40 now.

It wasn't until about three years into it that I started to suspect the Mirena was causing her libidinal issues. I initially wrote off the changes to having new baby. Obviously I've never been around a new mom and didn't really know what to expect. She was very much like many of you have described. Sometimes uninterested, sometimes willing to indulge me, but that ends up not being worth the effort for anyone, and really added to the mounting resentment. Sometimes apparently nauseated by the idea of being touched.

As our daughter grew older and more independent, things weren't getting any better. I knew she'd been through motherhood twice, and had a healthy sex drive when we met, so I kept hoping it would return in time. Again, as others have mentioned, I felt I was the problem. She must not be attracted to me anymore.

Finally, at one point when we were discussing our problems (which is difficult but a worthwhile exercise none-the-less), I mentioned it could be related to hormonal inbalance from the iud. It was no more than a guess. She was nearing time to remove and decide on next steps. I was completely against having another implanted. After a little research here and elsewhere, I was convinced this was the problem.

I had a vasectomy. I know I'm done fathering children anyway, so no reason for artificially induce hormone levels on her part. She had the iud removed a couple of weeks ago, and it's like a prayer has been answered.

It isn't all about sex. She wants to be close to me again, on the couch watching a movie. She no longer chooses the chair over a seat next to me on the sofa. An offhand double entendre didn't make her mad anymore. She sleeps closer to me in bed than she has recently. In short, it's like it was before our daughter came into our lives again, which is everything I ever wanted. For the first time in several years, I'm comfortable, confident, and content with our relationship.

It's only been about three weeks since she had it removed. She spotted some afterward, but has not yet had a full cycle. (I understand that is not uncommon at this point.) I'm hoping beyond hope that this is our new normal. As the vasectomy shouldn't affect my hormone levels (and so far doesn't seem to have) I'm optimistic about our future. We've been together for 12 years, and for the first time I feel like we're a happy little family.

If you're having doubts or concerns, talk to your doctor. Maybe even more importantly, talk to your partner! Men are fragile. If it had't been for our daughter (the center of my world), I may have left. The feelings of inadequacy and dissatisfaction were at times unbearable. Don't allow this to ruin an otherwise good relationship.

April 14, 2017 - 8:15am
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

As I'm reading all of these comments and can relate to each and every one of them and I am getting more and more upset with myself for keeping this mirena iud in for so long. It has literally destroyed my sex life. I am only 23 and i have no desire what so ever to have sex with my fiancé and he is thinking that I am no longer attracted to him which isn't the case. So we just tried to have sex after a very long drought. So we're doing the foreplay and everytime I would get aroused, it's like it would go away just as quickly when I would become horny. So after 30 mins or so of the back and fourth horny not horny I finally say let's do it.. so we're preparing to do it and as soon as he licks my boobs I was immediately turned off smh. So we had gone back and fourth about not being attracted to one another anymore and maybe we shouldn't be together until I googled this site. I thought I was going crazy about how I've been feeling and I'm happy to know that I am not. So I will be getting this thing removed on the next available appointment my OB has.. i miss my old self ..

April 11, 2017 - 11:28pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Anonymous)

yes everything you are saying. My wife removed it 2 years ago and though things are a tiny bit better, I am wondering if this is just how it is going to be the rest of our lives. It is full blown sexual anxiety where she has to take xanex to be with me.. sucks to say, but it's where we are at. There were other issues beforehand, but Mirena was the icing on the cake. Luckily we both acknowledge it as a faith test and we have God that kept us together and strong. Praying for full closeness though.
Thank you for posting!

April 14, 2017 - 2:02pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Anonymous)

Thanks for the insight. My wife removed it well over a year ago and things are still amiss in the bedroom. It seems to be getting better little by little, but she has anxiety about sex. I don't know whether it was just bad habits over the years or this stupid Mirena IUD... or some of both. I've just had to learn how to compensate and really allow God to intervene, work on myself and loving her as a husband is to.

April 12, 2017 - 6:55am
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

I have had a Mirena for the last 2 years after switching from a copper IUD, which gave me a heavy period and horrific back pain every month. I was at the point where I hated to even look at my husband and didn't want him to touch me at all. We have maybe had sex a half a dozen times in the last two years. My doctor blamed it on being a new mother, work stress, etc. but I wasn't convinced. I started researching and came across this conversation. I also have had cystic acne for the last 2 years and always seem to be tired, apparently 2 other side effects of the Mirena. Last week I had the Mirena taken out and after 3 days without it I started to not hate my husband anymore! I wanted to give him hugs and kisses again! Then after about a week I actually wanted to have sex and was able to orgasm! I haven't had any orgasms for the last 2 years with the Mirena. I am astounded that this birth control messed up my hormones so much and cautiously optimistic that things will continue to get better. If you have a Mirena, have it removed and see if it helps before giving up on your relationship.

April 7, 2017 - 4:53pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

To all of you who are even thinking about getting the Mirena removed, just do it! If you are having doubts, you are not happy.
I had the Mirena iud for over 2 years. During that time I lost my libido, had reoccurring yeast infections, lack of sleep, and was literally not attracted to my boyfriend. I got it taken out 6 weeks ago and my libido came back (with a vengeance) when i had my first period. I am sleeping better than ever (like twice as long every night). I have had 0 yeast infections. And have refell in love with the boy wbo stuck with me through all the crap. I am using a combination of the diaphragm and the calendar birth control (knowing when you are fertile). I think all this new hormonal birth control is disconnecting women from their bodies. You all have the power to control your bodies and fertility. Don't let anyone pressure you into doing things you don't want to do to yourself. There are always other options, even if they are less common. Good luck to you all!

April 3, 2017 - 8:44am
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

March 2010, I gave birth to my only child. Being an unplanned pregnancy..Before birth my doctor and I discussed birth control options for after.. and the one that was %99.9 effective is the one I chose. Mirena. My child's father and I have been together 8 years. I was supposed to have the mirena for only 5 years..I had it removed just recently after 7 years. My life is insanity and he and I have been through hell. From loving the shit out of each other to wanting to kill each other. We have hurt each other a lot and that can't possibly help in this shit. I can still get aroused but it's not easy and when I get there it's great, but not always. I start feeling amazing and then just go dead inside. and I am annoyed with sex. And when I'm annoyed, I'm like one other person who shared their story on here. I don't​ want to be touched. It makes me just angry. I don't want it. We could be smiling and laughing but I get sad or angry thinking about it...It's been this way 7 years. Really not helping my already fucked relationship anymore. I just want to be normal. Idk. I just know that when I can achieve being super horny or whatever, it's amazing. But it's not often at all. I get irritated when he tries anything and like I said could be us not getting along and going through shit but either way if the mirena is lowering my drive it's not helping my depression and inability to enjoy my relationship when it's happy. It could be causing my inability to enjoy my relationship when it is all good. I just got it removed and replaced. Hurt so bad. Took 25 minutes to get it in. Maybe I've been living in hell because of this thing..Who fucking knows.

April 3, 2017 - 3:11am
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Anonymous)

I had a similar experience and got the mirena taken out 6 weeks ago. I was not crazy, i was right. Literally, my first period after getting the iud removed worked like magic to set me back to normal. I say try a form of birth control that agrees with you, don't let the iud make you feel like a different person. Good luck to you!

April 3, 2017 - 8:50am
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