My boyfriend continues to save pictures of naked women on his computer after I've asked him to stop! Then masturbates while I am sleeping in the same room!

Since my last post, my husband tried to be intimate with me this morning, I told him no and he stomped off like a child. I said "Really? How old are we?" And he remarked, "Don't even start with me!" Then said he didn't understand why I wouldn't have sex with him, I finally told him I had need more photos on his phone and that he still had not gotten rid of all the girls on his instagram that should not be on there. He said he didn't know what I was talking about....I couldn't believe him. I still don't believe him. I know full well he is lying to me, I'm not even hurt anymore...I'm just angry. He knows what I'm talking about but he seems to think if he says he doesn't, I will just continue to drop it and move on. This time, I don't think I can. I could have forgiven if he had told me the truth, but I can't when he lies to my face. I mean, I can't even find out the reasoning for it if he won't even admit he is doing it. He deleted the photos I found most recently, but I know from his history this will only last for so long and in a couple weeks or months, there will be new ones on there and the cycle will continue. He obviously is never going to stop, or stop lying. On top of everything else, he took out a title loan on his truck a couple months ago (his truck is the only vehicle we have and the only thing of value we have left after trying to barter with our landlord to keep from getting evicted)...and he didn't discuss it with me beforehand or tell me about it. Well, because he still has not gotten a job (due to him acting as if he is too good to work most places), they repossessed his truck yesterday afternoon and we are officially stuck with no car. Although it is "his truck," I feel I should have had a say in whether or not we took out a loan on it like that, especially when it was PAID FOR. Am I overreacting that he didn't discuss it with me or even tell me about it?

I have had the same issue with my husband. He not only continues to save these photos on his phone, he lies about them or when confronted tells me he doesn't know how they got there, there aren't any there (like I'm making it up) or someone sent it in an email and he hasn't had a chance to delete them yet (which is b.s. because things do not automatically save the way he is claiming they do/are). He all of the sudden deleted them a couple months ago and I thought he finally realized how wrong it was, especially as a Christian married man. Well, the last couple weeks or so, they are back and there are more than ever. I was so angry when I saw them on there again I nearly left in the middle of the night. It's to the point I don't think I can stay with him anymore. To make matters worse, he had the gall a couple nights ago to use his parents internet when I was sitting in the same room as him, look up and save pictures and stuff on his phone, lie to me when I asked what he was doing (he said he was playing a game), and then when we got home, he wanted to have sex and I wasn't really in the mood (haven't been since I found the photos again) but he still kept trying and I finally just gave up saying no. It was not good sex for me because I felt like he wouldn't listen when I said I wasn't in the mood and also because all I could think about were his phone photos and all the lies that went with them. Afterwards, I discovered the new photos and knew what he had done, looked at them with me sitting right there (knowing I would be upset about it) and then basically used me to get off. Again, if I had a vehicle, I would have left in the middle of the night. I don't even know what to do anymore, talking doesn't do anything cause I have talked the subject to death I feel and he never changes. I'm glad I'm not the only one with this kind of issue, but not glad because I know how much it hurts, is frustrating, etc. Some of the other photos my husband has on his phone are naked pregnant women, which he has admitted to thinking were hot. This is weird to me and would be weird even if they were clothed, but it's also disrespectful in my opinion because we found out last August I can't carry children because of a health problem I have. When I found out I was crushed, he knows that, and he won't leave that stuff alone either.

Wow, viewing this & now understanding I'm not the only one who feels inferior is such a relief. I have been with my partner (fiance now) almost 2 years and well since we started seeing each other this material has been creeping up through the cracks since our 3rd month of dating..I have found porn dvd's - porn sites-chatting sites - booklets-images and now a week ago I went on to his internet, simply searching on google bookmark and "hot boobs" porn sites came on the history that had been removed on history but not on google history when you click in the block.. I think it doesn't hurt as much as it used to but has rather disappointed me after I have asked him to stop looking at things like this because it makes me feel uncomfortable. I have been told that I am insecure, a jealous freak and that I create things in my own head. I have accepted this because he says "all men do it"...Till I told him why...I have even considered surgery.. let me explain-you see I have a problem with both breasts and well it's not a major thing, but its embarrassing enough to know I'm not perfectly normal. I have inverted nipples. He knows this as its not easy to hide although sometimes I wish I didn't even have breasts. I know that if I have my breast surgically corrected I'd probably not feel uncomfortable or inferior..He thinks my breasts are perfectly shaped - perky but I think the opposite. So I'm still thinking its me.

I am having this same issue w. my fiancé. We just had a baby together and last month I found videos of him and a few of his ex's having sex saved in his new email that he forwarded from his old mail. He also had tons of naked photos of girls of all ages and skin tones. And we argued and I wanted to break up but he deleted them and promised to never do it again BUT.. last night he went out w. friends and ignored 38 of my calls within 2 hours. Then he finally picked up and said he was in the car downstairs w. his friend. 30 min passed so I walk downstairs to see him in the car looking at naked pix of women. Then I go thru his phone and find new picx of his Bffs gf naked!!! He's so persevered that he saves pix of anybody's as long aS they're naked!! And his stupid friend had the nerves to send naked pix of his own gf to him. Disrespectful. Idk what to do. I feel like I am not good enough and that he wants to sex other women instead. I am 5'1 and weigh 117 lbs. I don't even look like I have kids. I know my apperance isn't the issue and neither is sex so why can't he stop!!!!????? HELP ME PLEASE SOMEBODY!

I so feel you. My marriage is on the verge of being ended because of thhis issue. My husband saves the pictures on his phone. He said he had deleres them and he lied. He lied to my face even about how the pics got there and tried to tell me he didn't put them there and all this stuff. I found even more new pictures recently. I am to the point i dont want him to even come near me anymore. It hurts i know. Just know you are not alone

For the sake of a bit of balance ... I guess I'm just a lucky man, never had hassle from my wife over my looking at porn, masturbating when she's not in the mood or whatever. Aside from checking out what I'm looking at once or twice out of curiosity, she's not that interested in pictures, has been known to watch movies with me though (average of a couple of times a year I guess). For me looking at porn is part sensual and part sexual, I know I'm sometimes turned on by it but the feeling is sometimes more akin to when I'm looking at a favourite view or seeing a great work of art. Don't know that that's the case for other men, but one or two comments I've seen elsewhere makes me think that it's particularly the case for those of us treating it as a hobby.

We've been together since 1984. I've never been so much as tempted by another woman. Oh, and she works whilst I look after house and child - so I'm not exactly pulling some kind of macho act! Why is this ok and why does it work? First, the porn never replaces the real relationship, it is dangerous when it gets to the point of addiction but I'm not sure all the men accused of porn addiction are addicted - some are, but I suspect some just like it. Secondly, I've always shown her a pile of respect and given her tons of support for things she wants to do and achieve, she is the most important thing in my life. Third, she hasn't asked me to 'give it up' - which really is just asking me to go against my nature, so either I'd end up not having porn but having fantasies about (say) a neighbour (dangerous) - or simply hiding it, feeling guilty even if she didn't find out.

Two final thoughts, this first can apply to a lot of things not just this. You could say 'if he loves me enough, he'll give it up'. So ok, but you know he likes it, so if you love him enough, then you'll let him look at porn when he wants to. And around we go, on a circular argument.

And finally - best solution - judge him on how he treats you and other women. If you like what you see, the porn doesn't matter, stick with him. And if you don't like what you see, whether he stops looking at porn or not - ditch him.