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ask: My boyfriend is younger than me and I am afraid that people notice.

By Anonymous
 
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I am 37 and my boyfriend is 30. We have been together for over five years now and are very much in love. We are on the same page about marriage and babies and are figuring things out together. I have never been so happy with a man or been with one who, though younger than me, is so at ease with himself and mature for any age. And he is super crazy about me.
The problem? It's me! I look young for my age and am what most poeple would call very pretty. I am super fit and active and bubbly and youthful. The issue? Well, recently an aquaintance of mine asked me if my boyfriend and I were "different ages". I just knew that she meant that she felt he was younger than me. I know that I shouldn't care and that in five years, this is the only time that this has happened but it upset me a lot. I see us as similiar. We are. If someone sees us together they usually say "hot couple" or "you would make beautiful babies". My guy is handsoem as I am pretty.

This aquaintance saw me as older than him. I know that this is probably going to happen at least occasionally as we get older but it hurts me. I spoke to my man about it and he just old me that he sees us as the same age and that I am beautiful and she probably didn't mean anything by it but I can't get it out of my head. I am NOT the cougar type and don't care about Demi Moore...besides there is only seven years between us. The thing is that my man looks young too! So if I look 28, he looks 22!
Any advice? I need to let go of these negative feelings as i don't want to soil our realtionship with my insecurities.

Add a Comment40 Comments

EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

I'm 26 and my boyfriend is 23 and twice older women in their 50s asked me lf he's my son. It really hurts my feelings.

January 18, 2015 - 9:16pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

I'm 26 and my boyfriend is 23 and twice older women in their 50s asked me lf he's my son. It really hurts my feelings.

January 18, 2015 - 9:13pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

Okay,I have you all beat. My boyfriend is 34 and I am 51. He looks younger and so do I but he definitely could be, looks like and is young enough to be my son. I am successful and comfortable financially and I am sure that helps. We have been together for 1 1/2 years and love each other very much. People have commented on his being my son and he says he is my step-son and his father passed away. I say, yes he is my son, except I sleep with him! Often I want to break-up but he adores me and I adore him! Our plan is to get married but I feel very uncomfortable with the age difference. Good Luck!

January 9, 2015 - 11:52pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

I am Nina, and I am 26 years old, my husband is 23. I don't really think age makes a difference in love... Age is just a number, if it is meant to be, it's not important the gap, as long that it's not two far away! :) I met my husband when I was 14 and he was 10 years old. We always spent The summers together because he is my bestfriends cousin. And then his mother and father adored me so much that I became The babysitter for his younger sister. I never thought of him as a little brother, but never anything of attraction either. I just cared a lot for him. But then at 19, and he 15, I realized that he had sort of a Childhood crush on me. Then when I was 22, after 2 years of whooing me, i fell in love with him two, and we dated secretly, scared for it not to work, but also what The others would say. I think that the harshest people to tell, where my family... His family popped a champagne when they heard The news. Now we're married for 1 year now and expecting our first baby! It was hard when I was studying and him still being in high school. I remember I always felt a little embarrassed telling about him to others, but when they met him personally, it was like The age difference didnt really matter. I could not Ask for a better realationship. And I was a girl who always preferred older guys. I just think that, it's silly to be embarrassed of a detail so smal, like a number!

January 4, 2015 - 3:16pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

I'm 33 and my bf is 26 we are going on 3yrs now and I have to say this has been the best relationship I have ever been in. He adores me, treats me like a princess and always has my back. I have had quite a few relationships with older guys but none have treated me as good as my bf now does. The age thing doesn't bother him at all. I don't look my age everyone always mistakes me for being 21 and he tells me he doesn't even think about our age difference he sees us as equals. It does however bother me at times and I think I just get caught up in what other people might think. But at the end of the day I remind myself it doesn't matter what people think. You need to live your life for yourself and make yourself happy.

December 6, 2014 - 9:59pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

So , is five years a huge gap??Tell me the truth...My boyfriend is five years than me, and iam very in love with him. i get worried about the feauture ..But sometimes i feel if it makes you smile and happy who cares...

November 6, 2014 - 4:07pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

Most people do not believe I am 41 years old, I do not believe it myself. Most would put my age at late 20's , early 30's. I actually do not know where time went but my boyfriend is 28years old, soon to be 29yrs. He treats me like a queen and says Im the sexiest girl ever. We have a 12year age difference. I do not act or look 41yrs old. I have a high fertility rate too!. Niether of us has kids but im secretly trying to convince him to have kids. He is the best boyfriend I have ever had. And he is absolutely gorgeous. So for the poster a 7yr age difference is Nothing.

October 22, 2014 - 9:09am
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

Girls! I am 31 and my beloved boyfriend is 24! I have never met better person in my life so far! He is just amazing! He is so loving, carrying, sensitive, respectful, responsible and has a great sense of empathy. He is a great listener and so wise and mature! I was able to see his kind personality since I saw him for the very first time! So honest person!
I have never been happier in my life! He treats me like a princess! We spend the time together, we talk about having family in the future like something very natural to us. We just have the same attitude to life and the same values! I just can go on talking about how much I adore hime and love him and how happy he is making me. But of course the age difference!!!! So judged within the society! But I am tired of it! GIRLS! LADIES! WOMEN!!!! We should be proud having younger partners! They see us as sexy, beautiful creatures despite we are older. And be honest here! Its not aging what make us being mature! There might be the age difference however you can be a perfect match to each other just because you are at the same level of understanding the life!
Just be happy and live the life as you want and not how the society wants you!!!!

August 3, 2014 - 3:01pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

If a a man is attracted to you and u are older, chances are you look younger and are attractive. Just realize it ! And so you might age faster, so what. If they love you theyll mention it and talk about it. Its better than being ditched. It proves they love you. Just fix it if its bothersome. Really? Yeah. Really. If my man got fat or grew a beard I hated..... well, you b the judge.

July 17, 2014 - 5:44pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

I have a friend that she is 33 and a 21 yr old guy like her a lot.she enjoys his company and she smiles a lot with him.she hasn't felt like this in a while,cuz of her last relationship she's been in with other guys. She know he is much younger than her but she worried about the age in difference. What can I tell her? Is even ok for the big age in differences.,to even work out?

June 4, 2014 - 10:10am
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