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My child doesn't look like either of of that much?

By Anonymous March 31, 2012 - 6:15pm
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My son is about three years old and doesn't look like his dad at all. He looks like me a little bit but not that much.
He has brown eyes like me and his father. But he has black hair? I have naturally blonde hair and his dad has medium brown. I am fully white and his father is fully (very pale) Brazilian. I have a darker skin tone than his father but my son has a very dark tan skin tone (which actually matches my dads quite well).
Point blank, his jaw, lips, certain features, etc. do not resemble his father very well. Only a few people have mentioned he looks like me more than his dad but not many. My child's father never met his own dad so I have no idea what he looks like or his side (because I know genetics can carry from the grandparents and other genes). I feel like my sons dad questions sometimes and this bothers me as we are not together anymore and I know for sure he is the dad. I do not want a paternity test.

Is this just recessive genes or will he begin to look like his dad more later? He has lost a lot of his baby-puddgy faced quality's and is starting to look like his true face. How do I deny a paternity test politely ? He has not asked for a test yet, and I am not asking for child support.

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EmpowHER Guest

Hi there, I came across your question and just had to comment. I do the marketing for Identigene, the only DNA paternity test available in the drug store. The test is 100% accurate and it is a painless cheek swab. Results online in 2 days, in case you decide to go that route.

April 12, 2012 - 4:12pm
EmpowHER Guest

Hi Anonymous,

Thank you for your question and welcome to Empowher. It is not uncommon to have a child that does not look like the mother and father as there are certainly genes in family genetics that can cause this. I am certain that your child looks like someone but since you do not have that relationship with the other side of the family, it would be hard to find out exactly who. My parents are both under 5'8 and I stand a tall 5'3 yet my brother is 6'2....where did that come from? My Father's side of the family.....not my parents.

If he asks, say no, if you feel strongly about it. Although, he could have a court appointed paternity test that you would have to adhere to legally. There are even paternity testing that you can buy over the counter now which he could do on his own if he sees his son. I am not sure how accurate they are as I am not familiar with someone who has used them before.

If he is not questioning paternity, I think you are fine.

Hope this helps and good luck.


April 1, 2012 - 6:25am
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