share: Hysterectomy Done - Feeling Worse Than Before - Upset Done

It is so nice to know that women are being proactive with their on health care and becoming involved enough to ask the right questions and for not settling with physcians biased opinions. My opinoins are also biased from my perspective - which is always to assist in individuals to their deepest knowing space within as this is the only place true healing ever occurs. Using physcians to assist, vitamins, hormones, acupuncture - whatever healing modality you are drawn to - are only tools. The real healing occurs within the integrated self. Our culture takes away from our center and redirects our thoughts, actions and emotions to the outer world. The more of us that attain that level of self connection and self honor will always know the best route forward - whether it be surgery or conservative, no one outside can judge that. The pinnacle is to always make decisions from love not fear. Remember that conventional medicine is a fear based practice and has to be as they are saving lives and making critical decisions. When we are addressing perimenopause, menopause, post menopause, for example, we can move with it gracefully and honor the changes that are a normal process of life as this is not a life threatening condition (although many of you may disagree with this in the height of it :)). Thank you all who have embraced this very necessary dialogue. Blessings and health always, Dr. Ramsey

Hello Everyone,

Joanna, you are right; in that, I need to review all my medical records and such. I have gotten some in the past, but hope you understand; in that, reading some of these medical 'transcripts', it is as if reading a foreign language to decipher. I am just so happy to hear you went this different route for your fibroids. I do, again, wish you the best on your recovery process. I know there could be more I could do with perhaps natural aides, but I went that route once, and bought items which I believe I just went to the wrong 'Natural Health and Vitamin' store for. I do not think the lady who helped me had ever had a Hyst., and she was, unfortunately, not the person to speak with. Don't get me wrong, and nothing against her. It just that, I want to hear from someone who says, "Yes, I know what you are feeling. I have been there, felt that, and this is what has been of tremendous help for me." Isn't this sad? I have to go to a 'Health and Vitamin' store to try to get aide from a doctor destroying my body? Again, I am all in favor of these stores, but how come a GYN cannot give me advice? I am not referring to the doctor who did this dasterdly deed to me. I am referring to the FIVE GYNS I saw afterwards for help. None of them offered up any help; except, one so called 'specialist' GYN who I saw, and drove 500 miles to see; told me I must have 'Fibromyalgia', and to be treated for that. (Give me a break!!!) He was also a "Wham, Bam, Thank You Maam" type of 'specialist'. I was so upset leaving his office! It was so hard for me to make that trip, and all the expenses involved also with hotel stay, gas, food, etc., and he took twenty minutes with me, after I waited an hour in the waiting room to see him, and oh, I bet he got his joy of seeing another woman and her legs opened 'spread eagle' to tell me this. Sorry, but it just irritates me that doctors do this, and call themselves 'specialists', and to have the end result with seeing him to get nothing from this. I was destroyed, emotionally, after that visit. I felt so lost, and I sat in my car at that hospital parking lot where he was located, and this was the fifth doctor I had seen for this, and just almost called my sister, who lived there, and had her pick me up. I actually did not feel safe to drive; I was that upset. All this due to a doctor doing a Hysterectomy on me unneeded, and passed me off to pursue other avenues. Oh, I did not mention that... After complaining for nine months after my Hyst. to the doctor who did it; he said, "Well, it just takes time for your body to heal after a Hyst., and you may just be one to take longer with your RSD situation." He kept that 'tune' up all this time after five visits with him, post Hyst., and he finally said to me, after this nine months, and me saying that something was definitely wrong with me, and I did not feel well or right at all - "Well, I have never had a patient have a problem after a Hysterectomy. You might be best to get another opinion." So off I went to see all these other doctors - just like this one. That day in the parking lot, and crying my eyes out; I did regroup, and summoned up everything my mother had taught me. "Never give up", she would say, and also "You have to muester up, at times, all your inner strength when faced with a crisis/dilemma, and show, whoever who has wronged you; you will not let them win. You crying will be them winning, so take a few steps back, regroup, and show them you are a 'Heron'." My mother's maiden name came from this, and her side of the family had many strong women. My mother would say, in different situations of dilemma; "What would a 'Heron' woman do? Remember your great, great, great (something like this) grandmother crossing enemy lines during the Civil War to get so desperately needed salt. Long story, but she did drive a pony and cart seventeen miles to get salt from drippings of meat on the ground from a camp of confederates. (Hey, nothing against the south...) She did this by herself, at night; but get this...she was a proud mother of twelve children. How did women do it back then? So, I remind myself of my great, great, great...grandmother Heron, and say, "I can hold onto some stamina given to me from the 'stock' I came from (during these weak moments when feeling betrayed, down, and such...).

Oh golly, I got going off on a tangent here, but had to share these thoughts, and my horrible moment there in the car that day, and feeling defeated by doctors. If I know I have saved a woman from having this destruction done to her body; I will at least feel mentally better that I may have had something to do with this. I hope and pray this ends, and wish all of you the best. Let me know what I can do with any help any and all of you can share. I feel we are 'comrades', and our voices matter, right?

I better go. My back hurts (one of the aftermaths of the Hyst.).

Huge Hugs,

See Dandy

Whooohooo! Thank you, all of you, for responding to my written story about myself. It gladdens my heart to know, as I said, I am not alone, and others do understand. Thank you, from Michelle to: Susanc, CharlotteSal, Angelica, Kelley, Tina T., Nancy Drew Fan, and forgive me if I have left anyone out. Get this - When I went and saw this GYN also (did not mention before), he said I needed the Hysterectomy, but while "I am in there; I might as well take your ovaries out. You are not going to have anymore children, so why have your ovaries in there also, and we should take those out. Also, while I am in there, I should take your appendix out. You don't need that, and then you won't have to deal with a problem of a appendisitis (sp.?). Plus, you have a birthmark on your labia; so why don't I remove that also?" I look back on this, and I feel he was trying to 'rack up' everything he could while performing a surgery on me for two small fibroids. Oh, and he gave me his scare tactics with the ovaries left in there. "You don't want to take the chance of having them still in there, and a possibility of cancer." I quote what he said. He said too - the appendix is not needed in the body, so why not have it taken out? Oh, and the birthmark on my labia. It never bothered me, or my husband. This is personal, but feel I can share anything here, and why not; being that, I truly want to share EVERYTHING that happened to me, in order to help advise and save another female from listening to doctors when they propose unnecessary surgeries, and also any doctor proposing what mine did with trying to make an extra 'buck' with doing other procedures, "since I am in there..." As I have said, and fortunately I listened to a friend before I had my Hyst., and she said to not let this doctor take my good ovaries, my appendix, my birthmark on my labia, and at least I was saved from this by listening to her. I would love to see the doctor's and hospital's bill, had I let him do these other procedures, had he talked me into it. It would, I feel, turned from a $22,000 dollar procedure into a $40,000 dollar bill with all done he wanted to do.

Oh, and I am sure his office staff checked. I had great insurance, but due to go away after the first of the year. I look back on this, and I was due to have to decide to go with COBRA after the first of the year, or not have any insurance. I was on disability leave at the time, and worked with a great stock brokerage firm, which provided great insurance I signed up for. It was just that, as I said, the insurance time was running due for me to make a decision, after the first of the next year, on going with another type of insurance. My point being, I am sure his office staff checked this out, and informed him that my great insurance with Aetna would lapse after January 1st, of the next year. No wonder he pushed for me to have my Hysterectomy done before December 31st! Pretty sick, huh? He told me I could not afford to have one more period, due to the fibroids, and losing blood with every period. How dare him, when I think I figured this out. He was pushing to get me in there, so my surgery could be ran through my great insurance at the time, and pushed for these other procedures also - "Cha-Ching, Cha-Ching, Cha-Ching"...
Looking back on this all, I am thinking if I approached him; he should feel so embarrassed to not give me more time; as he knew I had concerns; yet, he kept pushing, and pushing me to do the Hyst. right away, and here we go with putting 'faith' into a doctor, and believing in him. How awful, right? I did do this...
had full trust in what he was saying to be the best for me, and look at me now...

I would have been better off to let nature 'take its' course', and let those fibroids work and shrivel, and I know, in my heart, this would have been the better alternative - but he never once spoke to me about this idea... What a scare tactic he used with me also about cancer of the ovaries. How sick is this?
My ovaries were fine; yet, he still wanted to take them out. (Oh, get me going...)

Thank you all again. I am so thankful all of you have posted. I would love to talk with any and all of you, and have you share your experiences, and also wanting to get any advice which may be helpful. Bless all of you, I mean it! Please forgive me, I have not checked for 'Typos' on this. I wanted to get this sent.

Huge Hugs to all of you!!!

See Dandy

SeeDandy1 -- I am so sorry that you are going through this. What are you doing to try and fix the issues the doctor left you with? Also, I am assuming you had a complete hysterectomy. But, just for clarification, was this what you had done? I, too, have been dealing with fibroids. In fact, the first doctor I went to said that he would want to do a hysterectomy (not sure what kind of hysterectomy he meant, but just hearing him say that freaked me out) on me if I was not interested in having any more children. I chose to get a myomectomy done with another doctor that I felt better about. I am currently at home recovering from that surgery, actually. I have to tell you that while it hasn't been easy, it has already been so worth it for me & the recovery process isn't as bad as what I have read and heard. I now want to look deeper into why my body created these fibroids and what I can do to try and make sure they don't come back. For me, that is going the naturopathic route to regulate my hormones and focusing on a better diet and wellness plan. I know you can't turn back time, but I hope that the community here can help you get back as much as possible to the life you used to know before all of this happened.

SeeDandy1, thank you so much for having the courage to share your story. You're right, a lot of women are probably experiencing the same type of consequences following a hysterectomy. And like you, I find it difficult to believe that doctors keep telling their patients the same thing with regards to feeling 'so much better 'despite what seems to be a pretty loud chorus of opposing opinion. What you've shared with us will help another woman. Like you, she will know that she is not alone and hopefully, others will realize that there are alternatives. You have empowered another with your story, I'm sure.

Hello! I have read your original post and all of the replies and I'm so sorry you've gone through all of this. I can also assure you that you are not alone. I know that won't solve things for you per se, but I know many women who have had issues post-hysterectomy. For example, one of my girlfriends told me that her first doctor had the "we might as well while we're in there" attitude with her parts, as in "we might as well take your ovaries while we're at it," and "we might as well take your cervix while we're at it." She had a bad vibe from this dude and ended up going to another doctor who she liked much better and who agreed that not everything had to come out. This is sort of off topic but it kind of goes with the whole "nudge nudge wink wink" that your doctor was doing to your hubby...it has always bothered me that the word "hysterectomy" and thus "uterus" comes from the word "hysterical". I don't like that at all. It seems insulting doesn't it? I think we need to change some of the terms that we use for surgery on the ol' male parts...any ideas?

SeeDaddy1, I think you've found a good home here at EmpowHer. I hope you post again too. Nancy Drew Fan

Dear SeeDaddy1:
Thank you, thank you, thank you for sharing your story. This is one the best ways to drive awareness around this issue by letting people know what happened to you. This is why our founder (Michelle King Robson) started EmpowHer. You two have such similar stories. The information you've shared will be seen by thousands of women. I'm so sorry this has happened. Since Michelle has gone through this type of health situation, I'm sure there are many things she can share with you to help get back you back to feeling like your old (new) self again. I'm sure there are thousands of women in your situation, so I hope you continue to post what you're doing to get back to feeling like yourself again!!
Thanks,

Kelley

P.S. I forgot to mention this... I have read and researched so much with other women's comments after they have had a Hyst., and upset. Why is it that so many of us say the same with doctors' comments? Just like, "You will feel so much better after having this done." Also many times I have heard, and just like I heard from the doctor who performed my Hyst., "I am sorry. I have never had any other patient complain of problems after a Hysterectomy." I cannot believe this - not when other women have heard the same...