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I have no sexual interest in women, but I find lesbians incredibly arousing, is this normal?

By Anonymous February 23, 2010 - 9:35am
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I have always been sexually attracted to men, however I find lesbians incredibly arousing. Sometimes even more arousing than a normal couple. Is it just me or is there something else?

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I am a 60 year old lesbian; so I'm wondering if you are what is considered bi-curious. The above comment was correct. As long as there is no harm in any way; then it's fine. But if you find yourself becoming attached to certain things and feel you must do them then I would suggest seeking professional help.

March 4, 2015 - 12:19am

There are a few "schools of thought" when it comes to human sexuality:
1. Almost anything/everything is "healthy" (or "normal") as long as it does not:
a. harm another person (with or without their knowledge)
b. does not cause you personal harm (physically, emotionally, financially, etc).
c. If you are able to maintain intimate, socially appropriate, committed relationships with another person when you choose
d. your arousal does not create difficulties, obstacles or unwanted challenges in your life (with other relationships, work, family, friends, finances, etc)

2. Religious views on sexuality.... these are so varied, and personal, that I'm sure you can fill-in-the-blank with your personal religious/spiritual definition of what "normal" or "healthy" sexuality would be for your particular beliefs

I am curious in what venue you are watching lesbians? Are you referring to two women holding hands, who are obviously in an intimate relationship, and this interests and arouses you? Or, are you watching pornography, or even TV or movies that depict lesbian couples during physical intimate scenes?

If it is the latter, I can understand how it would be arousing, as TV and movies can make almost anything sexually arousing and interesting (when it may not be in "real life"). Lesbian couples, as well as any sex scene depicted in the more mainstream TV and movies, typically are young, very attractive people, no visible physical flaws, no awkward moments, no talk of birth control (for heterosexual couples), everything is perfectly set in the scene... in other words, not true to real life. That is why it is arousing, for most people, as it is truly a fantasy to watch these people in their perfectly staged sex scene...regardless of gender(s). You are definitely not alone with finding the idea of sex between two women arousing, intriguing and interesting, as many people (both male and female) also do.

Bottom line: it depends on if you are feeling in any way that your interest/arousal is in the "unknown" and that can be sexually exciting..and completely normal and healthy. Is this in any way impeding or creating problems in your relationships or daily life? How are you acting on these sexual feelings? How are you viewing these sexual images (is it in a safe environment?)

February 23, 2010 - 1:28pm
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