We make a huge mistake by thinking that life is handed to us and we make do with what we get. That's true of some things; we're born with white or dark skin, eyes or hair, or we are raised in culture or religion that we have no control over until we're older. We can't choose our parents, or relatives or what height we'll end up being.
But as adults, our choices expand exponentially (nice alliteration there, yes?). We may still not be able to choose some of our situations but what we can choose is how we deal with it, react to it and how we conclude the matter.
If we need help with something, will we finally admit it and ask for help? Will we stop being self-absorbed? Will some of us finally put ourselves first? Will be stop being troublemakers, drama queens or martyrs? Will we care for our bodies more? Will we nag our husbands less and kiss them more?
Will be stop branding ourselves (mom! career woman! cougar! MILF! STOP IT ALREADY!) and just be who we are without the stereotypes attached?
What does rebuilding our lives mean? It means cutting out the toxins and realizing that despite our mistakes, our misadventures and the bad things that happen, we can let it go and start afresh. Yes, we can! We can stop that inner voice that incessantly tells us that we need to look more that that actress on TV (if she was a size 0 a few weeks after giving birth, we can be too!) that tells us that getting older is unacceptable (the alternative is a lot worse) and that making tons of money or having sex with lots of men is the definition of success.
The definition of success is knowing that we have what we have through hard work and dedication. This can mean our family, our homes, our jobs, hobbies, charity work...it can mean anything. We all find happiness in different things. Success means that we have inner peace and those critical voices in our heads have finally shut up. It means we stop caring what other people think and it also means we stop criticizing each other and having mental arguments in our own heads with them!
Being human means that we all fall down, we make mistakes and screw up. But being human also means that we deserve the chance to make it right again. To rebuild our lives and make our lives meaningful again. Life may never be 'prefect' for all of us. We all face challenges that sometimes seem insurmountable. But if given the opportunity, we need to grab it and rebuild our lives back to where we envisioned it as a kid - before all the baggage, inner voices and toxins got to us.
Are there aspects of your life you want to rebuild? How will you go about it?
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