share: Women of The Quiverfull Movement : No amount of children is too many
I was watching a documentary recently about a movement called Quiverfull.
30,000 strong so far in America and increasing all the time - as well as growing in Canada and Australia. The women of this group believe that no birth control is necessary (or even right) and that how many children they have is up to God and nature.
Many of these women have 10, 12 and 15 children. And they continue to have more. Most are self-sufficient who do not depend on the tax payer to support their family. They believe huge families to be their ultimate goal and suggest that 12 children born to each woman is a viable number.
They have many challenges, from the simple day to day aspects of feeding their kids and transportation, to education and health care. But they also enjoy a lot of fun and kinship, as well as tight knit communities with the focus on their home lives. Many break out in laughter at the notion that they live this life against their will. They're aware that society, in general, believes they need some kind of rescuing and if only they were more educated, they'd know how demeaning their life choices are.
Contrary to stereotypes, not all Quiverfull women wear long dresses and abstain from "material" things. Many are educated, sporty, fit women who believe that large families make an environment strong, not weak. They are well-rounded and as opinionated as any boardroom dynamo.
They are not without their (many) critics. There have been accusations of racism and feminist women have accused Quiverfull men of holding their wives back and disallowing female independence. The women have been called "breeders" and slaves of a patriarchal society. Far more commentaries are critical than supportive. And some of this criticism may well be valid - it can be a hard and exhausting life, with little personal time or the "me time" we have come to expect in our more mainstream lives. But in interviews, the Quiverfull women say that they are happy, content and would never be in this life unless they wanted to be. They are less interested in "me" time, or the "me" concept in general. Some think this is rather refreshing.
Not many people believe them. They must be brainwashed. They must be subservient. Why else would any woman choose this life? Quiverfull women believe that real choice is being allowed to live as they wish - not how others wish them to live.
Some of the men and women who believe in the no birth control rules of the Quiverfull movement include the Duggar family (of 18 kids and Counting on TLC) and some of the families on the the show Families by the Dozen.
Whether a popular lifestyle or not, people are fascinated by these families and their TV ratings are high. Family blogs are filled with supportive messages. Less admiring articles have been published by Newsweek, The New York Times and other large publications as well as countless social commentary blogs.
For more information on the Quiverfull movement, click here : http://www.quiverfull.com/ and you can check out a show about these women on WETV's The Secret Lives of Women here : http://www.wetv.com/secret-lives-of-women/
One former leader of the Quiverfull movement has her own website, talking about why she left : http://nolongerquivering.com/
Tell Us
Do you find these families inspiring? Why or why not? Could you see yourself having a dozen or more kids? How many kids is enough for any family?
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Add a Comment18 Comments
What a professional and neutral introduction to what is often a hot topic. I've been around a number of quiverfull women and I can assure you from the inside looking out the overwhelming majority of these women consider themselves very blessed and fortunate to be leading such rich lives. Yet the critics who often don't even have 1 child berate and judge them and make terribly negative assumptions about these women, their intellects and their happiness. It's quite pathetic. Of course these are the same people who believe in tolerance....
One thing that is worth noting is that within any large "movement" or community there are differences of opinion and even some theology. However most women and their husbands like me who consider themselves quiverfull agree on the great majority of issues associated with families and our faiths.
I created a quiverfull and large family directory here: http://www.arrowcollectors.com .
enjoy the topic!
jay
November 21, 2009 - 6:32amThis Comment
I am a 34 year old mother of six. Thats right, six! I am proud to be a quiver full wife, mother, and most of all woman. I am not abused, dilusional, or brow-beaten. I believe in biblical submission to my husband. Not as his door mat but as his help-meet, (this is the biblical term, not mine). Things are far more equal in this movement then people like Vyckie Bennett or Garrison now want to claim. Fame seeking femanist like Vyckie Bennett claim women in this "movement" are coerced are not complete without their husband because we need the "patriarch" over us. So how do you explain the counter to this, which is this "movement" also teaches that husbands NEED their wives. A completely whole person does not need "help" from anyone, there fore there would be no need to "meet". And those needs go far beyond the bedroom. It is sad that because most quiverfull families are reserved and chose not to respond to Vyckie's slander, that the silences are being assumed confessions of wrong doing. I personally know Vyckie Bennett, and I can assure you the story she now tells is far different from the story we experienced with her. Truth be told, I believe that when Vyckie lost her 15 minutes of fame with-in the QF family, she sought for more avenues of attention.
November 23, 2009 - 4:34pmAnon,
Thank you so much for writing about your experience. It's wonderful to hear thoughts from the inside of any controversial issue. And you make an interesting point -- in today's world, any person (or population) that chooses to be quiet or reserved is automatically considered to be in silent agreement. We are such a media-centric society that this seems to be the only interpretation we can put on it.
Unfortunately, that reserve also keeps the other side of the story from being told. And often keeps us from understanding those on the quiet side. So thank you again, and I hope more women with different perspectives will write.
November 25, 2009 - 8:13amHmm..one of the thing's vickie pointed out was the unloving and judgemental spirit of the quiverful movement. You just proved she was telling at least one thing that was true.
December 21, 2011 - 7:18pmThe husband is commanded to love his wife as Christ loved the church---i.e. to sacrifice his life for her. That truth is something the modern day "feminists" tend to never want to look into or acknowledge. To not take that half of the equation into account is to bring assumptions to the table regardless of the truth. Hard to respect intellectual cowardice.
And a lot of truth to your observation of the "quiet side."
jay
November 25, 2009 - 8:22amHi Susan - I too want to thank you for your professional and neutral introduction to what could be a very controversial topic. I had never heard of Quiverfull men and women prior to reading your article, and learned a lot from the information you provided. While this would not be a lifestyle that I would personally choose, I do believe in individual freedoms and can understand why others would choose this.
November 26, 2009 - 5:57pmThanks for this information, and since you said this is a growing movement I hope you will keep us up to date as new developments occur.
Take good care,
Pat
I have been following this movemetn for quiet awhile and find it absurd. How does the no of kids make you more 'godly'? At almost 40 I have no kids but not by choice I too get tired of being judged. QF isnt a faith at all. It doesnt help the infertile or childless woman's confidence. These women get shamed into more kids and many live in poverty. the poor kids dont have choices. While I support "Stand by Your Man' the man has to submit too. And Im not against large families Im against labeling kids as 'god's soldiers' and glorifying it on TV. Not everyone is suited for it. Vycki showed us the dark side Like what Tom Hanks said to Tom Cruise 'You cant handle the truth"
January 15, 2010 - 12:09amThe Duggars have said many times that they aren't quiverfull...
January 24, 2010 - 4:07am"Like what Tom Hanks said to Tom Cruise 'You cant handle the truth"
Actually, it was Jack Nicholson. And the movie was "A Few Good Men". If you're going to quote, at least quote accurately & give the reference.
Also, the Duggars ARE Quiverfull believers. They quote Psalm 127 right on their website which is the main inspiration for QF families. However; I will agree that in all the print & media I've seen of them, they've never come right out & stated they follow the Quiverfull movement. But then they've never denied it, either.
January 28, 2010 - 11:29amI am the 34 year old mother of six that posted earlier in this conversation. To the anonymous that wrote, "How does the no of kids make you more 'godly'?" I am sorry, but you have no idea what quiverfull is. Quiverfull does not mean more kids equals more Godliness. It means turning your fertility over to God. Being in His will 100%, being open to as many or as FEW children as God blesses you with. It does not dictate that you become a child producing machine. Some women are more fertile then others by design. Some will never bare a child, while others like the Duggars will bare 15 or more. Obviously your following of this movement has not involved any real research. Vyckie has not brought any light to the bad side. If you knew Vyckie you would see how vastly different she is from what she was. It is interesting to me that the same pictures she used to tell us all of her wonderful life, are now being used to degrade it. Wanna see Vyckie's other side? Check out her family blog that she kept origionally before her change of heart. http://7arrows4him.blogspot.com/
May 21, 2010 - 5:49am