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What Are The Four Break-Up Phases?

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More Videos from Sonya Zepeda 9 videos in this series

What Are The Four Break-Up Phases?
What Are The Four Break-Up Phases?
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Relationship expert Sonya Zepeda shares the four phases most women experience when a relationship ends.

Sonya Zepeda:
When women go through a breakup there are several phases that I feel that we go through which I’d like to share with you. So the first phase is generally what I call total meltdown and complete loss of insanity, and there’s two different things that women might do when they go through these phases. The first thing is, me, for example, I discovered that one, I wasn’t aware that I was crybaby, that I was a huge crybaby and just found that I would break out in fits of tears for no apparent reason anywhere and everywhere.

The second thing was I was a total binge eater. So as much chocolate cake as I could get with ice cream, caramel, everything. Or you could be like one of my girlfriends who is the exact opposite.

She is a complete wallower and went on what she likes to call a Triscuit, champagne, and cigarette diet and lost tons and tons weight and locked herself in her apartment and just wrote country song after country song. That is sort of the first phase that you go through, the total insanity, craziness, lunacy phase, as I call it.

Phase two is kind of when you are bringing yourself out of that coma. Some days are good days, some days are bad days. You might be having a meltdown one day; you might be a little stalkerish, trying to track him down, see where he’s at, do a little drive by, you know, I have done countless late night drive by’s even at my age with my girlfriends from anywhere from the age of 20 to the age of 50. So I’ve learned that at no age are we more mature, as well as, you know, other days you are like, “I’m better than him so who needs him anyway.”

Phase three is kind of when you come to the phase of you realize “I am better than that. Who needs him anyway,” and you sort of go through that, “I’m going to work out. I’m going to look great. I’m going to get myself together. I’m going to focus on my career and I’m going to do all these great, wonderful things.”

And the final phase is sort of Phoenix rising where you’re ready to get back out there, go out and take on the town. The world is your oyster and go hit the dance floors with all the confidence in the world. So that’s what I sort of think are the four phases of the breakup.

About Sonya Zepeda:
She has played both the heartbreaker and the broken-hearted in this crazy world of love. Sonya has explored many methods for successfully recovering from the collapse of a relationship. She has put her heart and soul into finding out what does and doesn’t work in this process. Through family, friends and her own trials and tribulations with men, she has written an entertaining and educational break up guide that will help mend your heart, fill your belly and lift your spirits.

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