Anorexia Nervosa

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Anorexia Nervosa Guide

Christine Jeffries

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ask: Calling all women who battle anorexia

By Anonymous May 3, 2009 - 1:58pm
 
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I am looking for women who are committed to overcoming anorexia for mutual support. It is shocking to me that nothing has been posted yet. I know you are out there!

I don't have anorexia for the usual reasons. I don't think I am fat. When I was growing up, there was not enough food to go around, and I had to learn to feel strong without food. I learned that it was more important for my brothers to eat than for me to eat. I learned that one had to "earn" the right to eat by proving their need, such as being an athlete.
I procrastinate, I refute the messages that are ingrained in me when I recognize them (which is not always in a timely manner), and I "just forget" to eat. I try hard; I have been eating five servings of fruit every day, but got weak and realized that I have not been eating enough protein! I focus on one aspect and another gets neglected. I need to go eat right now.

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Michelle King Robson HERWriter

Wow...what an amazing story!! Thank you for sharing your story and for wanting to start a support group here on EmpowHer. It is so important to have people who can validate how you're feeling and help support you. It's one day at a time and in most cases, it's one minute at a time.

I know many women who have battled anorexia, but not for the reason that you've just stated. I would never have thought about a young girl not having enough to eat and so at a young age, you learn to go without. So fascinating. The sheer fact you've recognized why you have anorexia, and how aware you are of your eating habits is a wonderful first step. The second big step is coming to EmpowHer to start a support group. You rock!!

I was never diagnosed with anorexia but probably battled it about 10 years ago. I decided to become a vegetarian, so I did. For me, there is no middle ground. When I do something, I do it full speed ahead. So, I cut everything out of my diet, including the good fats my body needed. It was all about control for me. I felt so out of control and had been controlled by many around me that I felt this was one area where NO ONE could tell me what to do or how to do it. As one of my friends explained it to me, it's like forgetting to put oil in the engine. Eventually, the engine freezes up. That's what happened to me. I thought I looked good and I thought I was healthy. Well, guess what, I was the only one who thought I looked good and I was SO NOT healthy!! One of my friends finally called me one day as I was having so many health issues by the way and said, you look like S--t. I was mortified. So, I called another dear friend and she said the same thing. Well, that got me thinking...could it be my strict vegetarian diet had been causing me more harm then good?? Sure enough, that is exactly what was happening to me.

After reading a great book by Dr. Diane Schwarzbein called the Schwarzbein Principle, I finally understood what I had been doing to my body both internally and externally. It was then when I started to slowly reintroduce meat and fats into my diet. It took me a while but I started to feel soooo much better after a few short weeks.

Interestingly enough, my periods had stopped and I developed high cholesterol from not having all the food groups in my diet. I never put two and two together though. Remember, I thought I was looking good and feeling good..HA! Not to mention my dry skin and hair etc, etc. There are many more side effects than one realizes when we don't have enough good fat in their diet. We are a skinny society. We need to become a healthy society. Skinny is not all it's cracked up to be...just ask me. I learned it first hand.

Have you gone through any type of treatment?? What can we do to support you? I'm glad you stopped posting your story to go eat something:) We need to get you to the point where all aspects of your health are not being neglected. I can tell by your post that you are a very special person. I'd love nothing more then to support you. If I have to remind you every day to eat and get enough of what your body needs....it would be my pleasure. Anything I can do or we can do as a company, we will. Just let us know what you need from us and let's see how we can support you, as well as supporting others who have overcome or are still fighting the anorexia battle.

Best in health,
Michelle

May 3, 2009 - 3:14pm
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Anonymous (reply to Michelle King Robson)

Hi, Michelle,
Thank you so much for replying to my post. As I read your story I recognized the dangerous ground upon which you were treading just one decade in your past. Reading of your recovery, I am inspired. I am 53 and have been in psychotherapy since the age of 25. Still, it was me, myself, who recognized that I have an eating disorder when I was in my thirties. My therapist at the time heard me, recognized the emergency, and got me within a couple of weeks into a five day "intensive" program in an eating disorders treatment center. The women I saw there in the long-term program made me realize where I was headed if I did not get a handle on this disorder, but the center was an entire day's drive from my home, and I have not yet met a therapist whom I found to know what to do to guide me to healing. I don't have time to educate a therapist; I need someone who understands that It is not just about eating! I do, however, continue my quest; I have seen my current therapist twice. The assignment she has given me is to "eat by the clock". Well, duh. I know "of" the book you read by Dr. Schwarzbein. It is mentioned in Aimee Liu's book Gaining, which I am now reading, and HIGHLY recommend to anyone with anorexia and/or bulimia, AND to the therapists who seek to help us. Michelle, you have already begun what you can do to help and support me, by answering my post. I need a support group, and I hope to find it among other women on EmpowHer. Do qualified therapists/counselors ever make themselves available via EmpowHer?

October 22, 2009 - 4:53pm
Hap (reply to Michelle King Robson)

Michelle, I need help to start a support group. I feel that no one cares about me.
Sue

January 3, 2010 - 4:16pm
Alison Beaver Guide (reply to Hap)

Sue,
I replied to you via the Personal Messaging system, but also wanted to let you know that there is a way to connect with other EmpowHER Members who are Eating Disorder EmpowHER members (just click on orange hyperlink for list of member usernames).

Are you interested in contacting each of these women to inquire about their interest in participating in an online forum on EmpowHER regarding their eating disorder?

Are you interested in having help contacting each of these women (there are probably about 40 women to contact via the Personal Messaging system; we can help!!)

Then...
- Are you interested in a Psychologist in facilitating the online support group?
- If a Psychologist is unavailable at this time, are you interested in an EmpowHER Guide to provide group facilitation to the online support group? I have the experience in working with eating disorder support groups, if you are interested, and we can discuss the options in more depth.

Please let us know what your preferences and expectations are, and we can explore our options! Feel free to send me a PM (private message) by clicking on my name (Alison Beaver) or responding to my previous email, so that we may talk more in depth. We will post final "results" on this discussion thread.

January 3, 2010 - 7:22pm
Hap (reply to Alison Beaver)

I would be most grateful if you would set it up and have someone to facilitate it!

January 3, 2010 - 10:50pm
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Anonymous (reply to Hap)

Me too! I would love to be able to join a group talk for people suffering from ED's. Keep me posted on where this goes. There are no near-by support groups where I live and I know I need urgent help. Thanks!

January 4, 2010 - 3:43pm
hollow on the inside (reply to Hap)

Hi Hap. I have had an eating disorder for almost fifteen years. I mostly restrict and have been in treatment four times. I joined this community looking for support as well. thank you for your post. I hope we get something going here. peace

January 22, 2010 - 4:12pm
Diane Porter (reply to hollow on the inside)

Hi, Hollow,

So glad you've found us here at EmpowHER. Eating disorders are difficult to live with, and good support is crucial. Welcome, and let us know more about yourself when you feel like it.

January 25, 2010 - 10:11am
Susan Cody HERWriter Guide

Dear Anon

Thank you for your post and for finding EmpowHer! I hope you can join a network of supportive women who can help each other to cope and overcome this eating disorder.

We have an excellent search function at the top right hand side of the page, and if you type in anorexia you will see our section on eating disorders as well as many posts by people suffering affected by this debilitating illness.

Our eating disorder page is here : http://www.empowher.com/search/google?cx=001740413268797642882%3Axdyajny... and underneath begins the list that you will see, of eating disorder postings, threads, shares, questions and expert videos and articles.

I hope you find them supportive and informative and I hope you know you are not alone - this is a battle that many people wage - but there is hope and support.

May 3, 2009 - 4:54pm
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Anonymous (reply to Susan Cody)

Thank you, Susan. I shall go right there! My name is Sue.

October 22, 2009 - 4:57pm
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