I am at a weird place in my friendships with my girl friends. I am 37 years old, and my husband and I are childless by choice. My female friends fall into 2 general camps: those who are my age who have young children, or those who are a few years younger and still into heavy partying (I'm done with that). I don't fit in with either group, and therefore I haven't really had any good "girlfriend" time in a couple of years. I'd say that the women who mean the most to me are the mommies, but they are so busy with their growing families and playdates with other moms that I never hear from them anymore. I struggle to relate to them because I've never given birth, struggled with breastfeeding, been awoken at all hours of the night to change diapers, or dealt with the heartache of returning to work. I've made a few attempts to reconnect with them, but it's different. Our interaction seems unnatural and forced, and I just end up feeling inadequate and rejected. They know that I never plan to have children, and it's like they hold it against me, like there's something wrong with me or I'm a bad person. They think I'm a child-hater (I'm not) or that their kids are this huge bother to me. I coo over dozens of photos of their babies and listen to them tell me all about their toils in motherhood, but they don't express any interest in hearing about my life.
I have a wonderful husband, but I need my girlfriends, too. It's to the point that I'm really struggling with depression over the sense of loss and disconnect with other women. Am I just supposed to wait it out until my friends' children have moved onto college, and then maybe they'll want/need my friendship again? What else can I be doing to reach out and connect to my mommy friends? I'm rather introverted, so I'm not the type of person that is going to join one of those "childless by choice" groups to socialize with other non-parents, with whom besides being CBC I'd have little to nothing in common with. Can I hear from some moms and "not" moms who have dealt with the same thing or can give me some insight?
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