Why Doesn't my boyfriend want to have sex with me anymore?

well i feel u on that because ive been with my fiance for almost a year and he couldnt wait to have sex with me and neither could i but lately its hes tired or he doesnt seem to want it untill i make a move.or its oral instead.and i keep thinking is it me cause i gained weight because i have stomache issues at the moment witch he tells me its not because he knows the reason for the gain.i have no idea but i feel the same us women always feel selfconscience about it and always ask is it me and how is he filling his needs.mine i found out one day he went and masturbated while i wasnt home so now im thinkin that maybe it is me but then again i wasnt home so i dont think anyone can really answer why men love to have sex everyday to it being a hassel all i know is that i would love some asnswers as well because its making me feel so worried and im so emotional about it i feel like im loosing him in a way. and it sucks to know that hes out there looking at other females because he might not be attracted to me anymore or maybe its cause hes tired or just to comfortable with me now and doesnt feel the need to want it everyday i dont understand it either i love him and just need more attention like he used to give me i dont care that its not everyday but i need my needs handled as well as he does when he wants oral its not fair. i dont know what to do either hope we can both find some answers

I am not fat, and I am attractive, and I am dealing with the same problem. My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over 4 years, and we've been living together for 3. I have a somewhat high sex-drive and his is VERY low. It is awful. We've discussed the issue a million times. He always says he wants to change, and he wants to please me, but he never does. I know he feels pressured, but this whole situation is causing me to resent him, and hate myself. He is so good to me, and we love each other very much. We haven't had sex in almost 4 months. We are both in our late twenties. I don't know what to do about this. I know he occasionally looks at porn, and I wouldn't mind that except for the fact that WE never have sex! I am open to constructive suggestions!!

Maybe you got fat and unattractive.

I don't know what to do anymore. Me and my boyfriend have been together for almost a year and a half. I am 23 and he is 25. When I met him I was a virgin, he had slept with 10+ girls since he was 14 (experienced to say the least). In the beginning after we had sex he couldn't get enough, doing it 2-4 times a day. Over time it slowed, which is understandable, but now I am lucky to get it once every 3-4 weeks. He says it is because he is stressed, or not feeling well, or any other excuse to not even bother to kiss me. He said that he is bored with sex because he has had too much in his lifetime. I know he isn't cheating and I love him. He loves me back and shows it in every way besides intimacy. He is the only one I have been with and now I have so much pent up that I go home alone and cry. It makes be angry and irritable and yet he sees it as me just changing from the person that he met when I get angry. I tried to curb the emotional and angry responses for a while but nothing changed. I have talked with him about this multiple times but he just doesn't want to talk. When I tried to make "a move" last night he said, "You don't have to come on so needy". Which resulted in me crying. I have never been much of an emotional person but the lack of sex is bringing me to tears. He keeps telling me to just wait and then it will come back but I cannot wait. I feel like I have tried everything from spicing it up to letting him have the reigns and nothing works. WHAT DO I DO!!!! I don't want to leave him, he is truly the love of my life, but I cant live without the physical connection. How can I get him to want me again?

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I have a very simular issue. My bf and I have have been together for three years. I will admit we both met while still unhappily married. We had sex several times a wk and he seemed "kinky". Then we broke up after abt a mth. Several months later we got back together. This time we realized it was love. We would make love at least once a week-when we could get together. Then about a year into our relationship, it went from once a wk to once every two weeks to once a mth to once every two/three mths. I started getting upset. He works 6/7 days a week and at first I thought he was seeing someone else. But talking to others, they said when I am not around, I am all he talked about. Then I thought he self satisfied himself. But I do that too all the time and still want him. Then I thought he was gay. God everything went thru my mind. I even accused him of insest!! Also when we would have sex he would have to watch porn. That was my fault. I started as a spontainous spice to have fun, but then I got tired of that cause I felt like it was a "clutch" that I didn't turn him on. Not true he says. He holds me all and loves on me and even touches me. But gone is the kinkyness. Used to be he would take it out and ask me to give him oral sex (which is something he has yet to do to me). Now when I volunteer he refuses. The only time is when he needs help getting hard.
I hate to say, but I did try the cheating thing once before, for the oral sex and to get satisfied. But I didn't feel the emotional satisfaction with the other man. You see, it's more than orgasm to me. I was raped and molested as a child and teen, and it's hard for me to have orgasm through intercourse. I feel the need to make love to the one I love, to I guess, feel loved and forfilled. He doesn't understand.
I feel that he has ED, but too embarrassed to admit it. I know cause he starts talking nervously while trying to make love or starts joking or even singing. I get mad at him and tell him to concentrate on ME. Also he is older than me, and the fact that he is all the time working and staying up late. I stay up late as well, and in my 40s and STILL want it. I feel selfish but I can't help it. I love this man so much, but I don't know how long I can go without. After reading these posts, I now realize that I am not the only one.
I tried everything from wearing sexy clothes to even dabbing pheromone oil on me! I got now where I don't care what I look like anymore. Cause I know it isn't me cause I get other men wanting me. But I don't want anyone else but him.

hi im a guy and in my experience its most likely that he has cheated on you or hes thinking about it either way he feels guilty for it and will try to act normal around you but acting and being are two different things entirely although noone can say wiether he has or hasnt id keep your eye on him just to sure.

how ever being that ive dated guys and girls i think i can help you out with this.men like sex nothing can stop them from wanted it apart from a few things a new girl sniffing around him,depression can drasticly change someones sex drive,diet can affect it,there are many things it depends on your situation and relationship my best advice is to try think of any changes

but in the mean time try this men like being teased show him what he could have for breakfast without letting him have his fun after a few days hell want to satisfy you :) if all else fails try different stlyes of hair you put down there etc etc or last resort...if it bothers you so much...get a new guy god put more than one on earth for a reason. hope this helps

Hi Anonymous,

I am sorry to hear about your boyfriends infidelity. I hope you can find someone that will treat you well for the New Year. Keep thinking positive..

Missie

my boyfriend is too hot and sexy he removed his clothes and mines too.i love him and he also loves me a lot he kissed me on lips.that was my best day.but after three days he fallen in love with a girl her name is jessica and my boyfriendS name is aden he cheated me my name is jenny